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Parenting Easy? Not!! by Kim B Miller
Friday, November 9, 2007
Not rated by the Author.
Parenting is not esay.
Parenting is a challenge but it was never meant to be easy. After all you are grooming someone's entire psyche. There is nothing simple or easy about that. Everything you say or do affects your child. When they are young and impressionable, if you say it, in their mind it is so. No one outside of God has that power and awesome responsibility.
I don't know where the concept of easy, concerning (anything to do with children) was ever derived. There is nothing easy about getting up several times a night when you just got back to sleep when they are infants. There is nothing easy about watching them like a hawk when they become toddlers because they have no conception of danger. The easiness does not become apparent during the teenage years either when they think you are as old as time or as dumb as dirt.
Perhaps the concept of it being easy came about because of what I call the pals. Pals are parents who have decided to take the easy way out. They make decisions based on staying friends with their kids. They don't want to alienate them or make them mad.
We've all seen it in one form or another. You're in a store and their child wants a toy. You listen to the "debate" going on. "Honey you already have that toy in the car." The kid responds, "But I want this one too." After a lot of screaming the parent caves in for the tenth time.
Perhaps you've been present for several typical Dr. Phil shows. You know the ones: My child won't get a job and he gets up at 2pm every day. When he does get up he basically hangs out playing video games. He has a brand new truck though and guess who brought it. Yes, you guessed right, it was his parents." Well we don't want him to take public transportation he gets home late sometimes, after hanging out." Mom washes his clothes and cooks his meals. He does not even have chores. These folks actually wondered why he was not responsible. Responsibility is not something that is plucked off a tree. No one taught him. No one forced him to follow rules, they were too busy being buddies. Now their 26 year old "pal" won't leave their house.
Keep in mind "school" is open every time a parent opens their mouth. This classroom never closes and the "student" is always watching and listening. Sometimes the "students" show us truths that we don't want to address. An ungrateful child may be mirroring a parent with the same character flaw.
Any true parent will tell you there will be times when your child just does not get where you are coming from. They may even hate you but that is the price you pay for taking this role seriously. Come on now, a lot of us thought our parents were psychos until we got older and understood their position. "What do you mean I can't walk home from the party? It's right down the block." Now we realize there were safety concerns.
I don't expect my kids to understand or like everything I say. I don't expect them to like me all the time that will come later. I don't want two little "clones" either. I want to help develop thinkers. I want them to be happy and prosper and I will get them there if I am willing to make hard choices now.
There is one simple, clear realization, if you think parenting is easy then you know you are NOT doing it right.
This is very good, and you sound as if you're a great role model.
blessin's, and in the words of Karen and Mary....discipline is challenging yet necessary, and very much worth it!
No it isn't easy; you can't even discipline your kids without getting the CPS involved (kids in school are given a number to the police or CPS if the parents even so much as raise a hand to them or threaten to discipline them); kids today are spoiled, unloving, unconsiderate brats who have no respect for authority. Sad! This is when discipline needs to be instituted!
(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in Tx., Karen Lynn. :(
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