This week, Studio Reader Stan gets another call from his Mother.
Studio Reader Stan picks up his ringing telephone.
Studio Reader Stan’s Mother: Studio Reader Stan, It’s your mother. I’m just calling to wish you a happy birthday.
Studio Reader Stan: My birthday was four months ago, Mom.
Studio Reader Stan’s Mother: Really? Well, since I have you on the line, do you have feedback yet on my caveman script? The one where he becomes best friends with a snow storm.
Studio Reader Stan: I did actually read that, and I thought you made some, uh, unusual choices.
Studio Reader Stan’s Mother: What the hell does that mean?
Studio Reader Stan: First of all, setting aside the fact that a caveman becomes best friends with a snow storm, I thought them taking a road trip to Vegas together was... a little much to swallow.
Studio Reader Stan’s Mother: It was a beautiful bonding experience for the two.
Studio Reader Stan: Mom, it’s a snow storm. And Vegas wasn’t even around in caveman times.
Studio Reader Stan’s Mother: Hello, it’s fiction. Movies are make believe, remember?
Studio Reader Stan: I’m sorry, it just doesn’t make sense.
Studio Reader Stan’s Mother: Yeah, what a coincidence, I’m also reading something right now that doesn’t seem to make sense... oh, it’s my will. And your name seems to be in it. A little crossing out here, a little crossing out there – and voila, now it makes sense.
Studio Reader Stan: Would you prefer I lie?
Studio Reader Stan’s Mother: It’s what I did when you used to wet the bed until you were 12. I told everyone you had a rare, but debilitating bladder disease. We got a lot of free cake because of that.
Studio Reader Stan: I wet the bed because you would tell me those frightening ghost stories every night before I went to sleep.
Studio Reader Stan’s Mother: Oh, so you didn’t like those stories either. This is the thanks I get for wishing you a happy birthday.
She hangs up.
Tune in next week for more of Studio Reader Stan's adventures...
The Wholly Book of Genesis is a humorous satire on the first book of the Old Testament where the Story of Creation, the building of Noah's Ark, Sodom and Gomorrah and the families of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob are thoroughly spoofed and broadsided.
