"My son, thy reservoir end in thou Gay Kingdom enlightens thy practitioner. Wear it with thy pride of manly inspiration," God said. "I made the rainbows safe for all."

God grabs Jacob's testicles (Genesis 32:25) to demonstrate to the young gay man.

"Place your hand under thy thigh of someone swearing sacred oaths (Genesis 24:2-3, 9).
Repeat after me, I, a gay design of God, do solemly swear to wear thy Gold-Tipped Ribbed Condom," God said.

The young gay man unzipped his pants and placed his hand inside, "under thy thigh".

God presented the young gay man with the prototype Gold-Tipped Ribbed Condom.

"Man wounded in thy stones can't enter congregation" (Deuteronomy 23:1) God said.

"God, is it true that you mooned Moses?" (Exodus 33:17-23) the young gay man asked.

God peered into the young gay man's eyes with hardened truth.

"I did. Here is thy proof of which you speaketh. Exodus 33:23 And I will take away mine hand, and thou shalt see my back parts: but my face shall not be seen."

And then God turned his backside to the gay young man...

Jamison put down his quill. He walked into the light toward his tilted cheval glass mirror. His nude, muscular figure he admired. As a gay writer and playright, Jamison wanted very much to protect his domain, and so he put on this millenium's gold glow-in-the-dark-ribbed condom. Out went the lights. The man on his bed fitted with the same gold glow-in-the-dark-ribbed condom rolled on his side and the two men touched golden swords swollen in the night, and thy reservoir caught thy fountain. 

Copyright Ms. Sage Sweetwater, firebrand lesbian novelist