There were times when he just plain got on her nerves! Wherever she went, seems he’d always show up. Like that time a couple of weeks ago when she and her co-workers decided to get together on a Friday evening after work. Boy, was she having a good time! There was food, groovy music and she had a joint of grass in one hand and a glass of wine in the other.  She was just about to do a barefoot solo to one of her favorite songs, when out of the blue, there he was. He was standing there with that-that look which she resented. It wasn’t condescending or judgmental, it was---oh!  She didn’t know what it was, but it irked her to no end! She eventually stalked out with everyone staring at her like she had lost her mind, and it had to stop! 

She wanted to end the relationship, but for some reason she couldn’t. She needed him. Deep down inside she knew she did, still he completely aggravated her. It was, among other things, scary. And that wasn’t the only thing that was bothering her. Here lately, she was becoming aware of something else; she was ‘hurting’ him. Yes, that was it! That was the look in his eyes! It was a look of hurt...of disappointment. And though she wanted to convince herself that she didn’t understand why, again, deep down inside she did. He was hurt because though he had proven himself to her time and time again, she had not changed. Whatever she did, she’d sputter some insincere, half-felt apology that he knew she didn’t mean. But he always forgave, always gave her another chance. He tolerated her spurts of anger and total disrespect not because he had to, or should have, but because he loved her. He really did, there was no question in her mind of how much he cared. He had even taken the time to tell her of his love for her in a long letter he had written just for her, which she had never even bothered to read thoroughly. Quickly scanning it, she dubbed it- boring. 

Yet, over the past couple of weeks, she was beginning to feel annoyed with herself. She was annoyed because, in spite of her admitted confusion of tolerating him when she really didn’t want to, something new was occurring that she really didn’t understand at all. She was, in fact, growing tired…tired, of taking advantage of him. And it was becoming more and more difficult to ignore the fact of how good a friend he continued to be to her in spite of her actions. Daily, she received from him and took whatever she needed. But she never gave anything back except, maybe, a bland ‘thanks’ every now and then. 

Then there was the other issue that was also nudging her lately. She was desperately, but futilely, trying to stop it but it wouldn’t go away; guilt. Yes, feelings of ‘guilt’ were steadily rising in her. She could no longer deny what she knew was true . He didn’t deserve the way she treated him. He hadn’t done anything to warrant the hurt she inflicted on him. She definitely enjoyed the fruits of his labor and his bountiful provisions, but then she selfishly expected him to take her shallow treatment.  She could no longer convince herself that the worldly jests she hurled at him were ‘painlessly’ being swallowed. This was not true . And she knew it was not true because every time she thought about it, she remembered…she could see the pain in his eyes. 

So, there she was having a heated debate with herself as to what was right and what was wrong. And finally, she came to a conclusion; he was, after all, a good guy and, she didn’t hate him. She just wanted to have a distant, unattached relationship with him. She didn’t want him trying to get ‘close’ but it seemed he wanted more of her and he wasn’t going anywhere. Thus, she decided she would ‘try’ to be more tolerant of him. She would make an honest effort to treat him at least half as well as she treated her other ‘friends’. It was when she made up her mind to do this that she considered something she had never thought of before; one didn’t deliberately hurt a friend, no, one didn’t outlandishly use a friend either. Even though one knew they could and would probably get away it, they didn’t… because they ‘valued’ their friend and their friendship. 

But how, she wondered? How could she show him that she was willing to be more tolerant of his friendship? He had everything, really. And anyway, it seemed all he cared about, or wanted…was her. All he desired from her was that she should make a sincere effort to return his feelings. 

She took it slow - one day at a time. Change was not going to come over night. She figured the first step should be to acknowledge that she had treated him wrong. So, unlike previous times, this time it was with a sincere heart that she asked him to forgive her for all the times she hurt him. She made him a promise and it was a promise that she intended to keep; she would try to never again ‘deliberately’ hurt him. She might ‘err’ being human, but never again would she blatantly and unashamedly stomp on his love for her.   

Little by little, as she came to know him better, she became more and more accepting of him. For starters, she began to read the love letter he had written to her. Soon, his attention she once spurned was now wanted and she began going out of her way to do things that pleased and delighted him. Her feelings for him grew, to the point where his constant presence in her life was not only expected but enjoyed, even relished. As they continued to draw closer, she found that his kind of love was appreciated. Thus, she made more time for him in her life and, inevitably, the places that she went and some of her friends…changed. 

However, the ultimate thing that happened was too wonderful! And it was something that pleased him immensely. She didn’t know when, or even exactly how it had happened, but one day she found herself to have completely fallen in love with him! His name…? Jesus. 

Is 49:16, S of S 6:3, 2Pet 3:9

copyright; 12/2015