"When love knocks you down, Major is a living example that you must get back up. Death, heartache, drama, and love gone wrong all tie into Major developing a heart condition called Mitral Valve Prolapse. Major gives an account of how her mother's death triggered her heart to weaken and the love of men caused it to shatter. If you ever needed proof that love kills, Major's life is a must read."
February 17th, 2009
“Ms. Love, are you feeling okay?”
“Yea.”
“Your heart is beating dangerously fast. We’re going to
move you to a separate room in the ICU unit.”
“Okay.”
The smell of Clorox hit my nose. The bright hospital
lights blinded my eyes. As the doctors filled the room and
stared at me with amazement I lay there wondering what
the big deal was.
“Okay Ms. Love we’re going to try to slow your heart
down. It should be beating around 80 times per minute;
it’s up to 200. That’s extremely high.”
As they injected me with the first shot of medicine
my heart literally stopped. My chest tightened. My face
grimaced. Fear ran through my body. I had to remain calm.
7
MAJOR
“No changes. Do it again.”
The second shot had the same effect, or lack thereof.
My heart still raced rapidly. After the third dose they
stopped. By that time I was given permission to invite
my boyfriend into the room; who I instructed to call my
family. As hours passed the doctors were confused as to
what exactly was wrong with me. My heart began to slow
down after numerous IV’s. Over 20 to be exact. My pee
was clear.
By midnight so many of my family members had
come and gone bearing gifts and love, fear and confusion,
desperation and anger. They all came and left with the same
question, what is wrong with her? Through it all I never
feared for my life until I saw the fear in my boyfriend’s
eyes. As he grabbed my hand and begged me not to leave
him I knew he was sincere.
Tears filled my eyes. How could the same eyes that
were so cold and enraged nearly 24 hours earlier be so
needy and desperate? I knew then and there that I had to
pull through. If not for me, for him.
8
LOVE KILLS
LOVE SICK
They say what doesn’t kill me defi nes me
so I’m laying in the hospital blindly
why shouldn’t I b I’m finally
getting your attention
all it took was 4 me 2 get sick
a heart condition
but look listen
that aint the part that matters
lets kiss an make up an cease
all this chatter
cause I know they gone call an
u gone start running an
my heart gone be drumming an
my mind going numb an
woah wait the machines going crazy
my heart is broken bout 2 burst
but your presence saves me
but you the reason I’m n here an lately
u been acting different
I know its just a phase
you hate 2 c me breathless an laying weak 4 days
so why u keep lying why u keep cheating
why u keep me crying its getting harder 2 breathe an
I’m love sick
how do I let it go
whether you love me or you leave me
its gone shatter my soul
why cant u love me rite why cant u give me what I need
why cant I accept that & just get the courage 2 leave
how cud you break my heart an force me 2 pick up the pieces alone
what’s the use its killing me anyway so y should i move on
I’m love sick
an i cant get well
you my earthly heaven wit a side dish of hell
I’m love sick
you’re my cure you’re my disease
so i guess I’ll just rest
an wait 4 u 2 fi nish me
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The e-book version of Sam Vaknin's "Malignant Self - Love - Narcissism Revisited". Contains the entire text: essays, frequently asked questions and
appendices regarding pathological narcissism and the Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD).
The e-book version of Sam Vaknin's "Malignant Self - Love - Narcissism Revisited". Contains the entire text: essays, frequently asked questions and
appendices regarding pathological narcissism and the Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD).
