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DrWinstonSutherland.com
DrWinstonSutherland
Category:
Family
Publisher: WestBow Press
ISBN-10: 9781449795818
Type: Non-Fiction
Pages: 200
ISBN-13: 9781449795825
Price: $7.99 (eBook)
Fatherly Influence: A Man’s Finest Legacy is built around five (5) powerful influences dads have in their kids’ lives.
The Influence of Affirmation: Every child looks to dad for validation and affirmation of who they are in their own unique identities.
The Influence of Affection: Dads who provide their kids leadership based on affection have great positive effects upon them.
The Influence of Association: A father’s presence brings with it several stabilizing influences in a kid’s life.
The Influence of Attention: When fathers take an active role and get involved in their kids’ lives certain bonding and other factors take place.
The Influence of Application: Where the question, “What Does Successful Living look Like?” is addressed, because kids want to see a role-model.
Fatherly Influence is a man to man chat about the treasure found in our homes. The author does not yell into a bullhorn; instead, as if over a favorite beverage, he seeks to empower, encourage, enlighten, and remind men of their fatherly privilege. This book taps the author’s personal experiences while keeping a finger on the pulse of contemporary fathers to deliver this compelling and affable non-fiction discussion. It discusses the opportunity a father has to help validate his children’s unique identities and the honor of being their hero. A thoughtfully crafted questionnaire recorded the experiences and suggestions of New York City residents. Their responses produced over forty pages of insights on the topic of “the mentoring father.” Fatherly Influence: A Man’s Finest Legacy takes a positive and dignified approach when inviting fathers to step into the role of fatherhood and embrace it with both hands for the experience of a lifetime.
Excerpt
One of the things mentoring fathers are keenly aware of involves knowing how their children think and feel about themselves. How children perceive themselves, whether accurately or inaccurately, will affect everything they do. Perception is reality in the eyes of the perceiver. As Anais Nin observed, “We don’t see things as they are; we see them as we are.” Our state of being—our happiness, sadness, contentment, discontentment, our general frame of mind, whether we esteem ourselves or struggle with low self-image, are all tied to our identity.
How we think of ourselves will be manifested in our choices and behaviors. The careers we pursue are influenced by our self-perception. The places we frequent reflect the associations with which we’re comfortable. The friends with whom we mingle are a reflection of our social identity. It has been said, “Show me your friends and I will tell you who you are.” The saying, “clothes make a man” betrays the impression we make by our choice of attire. The cars we drive have often been used as either a barometer of our financial worth, a status-symbol, or as an extension of our egos. The list is as inexhaustible as the clichés are endless. When it comes to food, it is said—you are what you eat. The music we listen to and the places we live are all subject to how we think, feel, and view ourselves. These are all outward manifestations of an inward reality—an ongoing, personal conversation with ourselves.
Our young need to know their history so they may have the proper background to understand themselves and fashion a fine future. They have a sense of where they came from, what they came through, and have confidence in where they are heading. They need to know and like who they are. There must be no question in their minds that they are loved, that they are valuable, that they are precious. These virtues are critical to shaping their sense of self-image which will enable them to stand firm when they must make the unpopular but right choices in life.
Tied to many daughters’ identity is their father’s place in their lives. He is usually the first man they will ever love. So when they’re ready to choose a husband, their measuring stick is their father. Of course, the same phenomenon is true for boys and their mothers. When considering a life partner, he subconsciously looks for certain traits reminiscent of his mother. But they look to their father to interpret how to live with and love a woman. Proven and timeless principles may be passed on to our kids—like choosing one’s friends wisely, and learning how to manage one’s emotions.
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