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Andrea Jane Williams

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Why Andicat is now a Fatcat
by Andrea Jane Williams   
     

Why skinny people suffer from Fat Phobia
A work in progress..by Andicat, former model, beauty queen turned fat.




Why Andicat Turned into Fatcat

by Andicat

1. It was a career move. (Fatcat's are mafia friendly)

2. She got to sit on her competitors.

3. They couldn't clone her so she became larger than life.

4. She sold more advertising space.

5. She saved a fortune on a boob enlargement job.

6. She gave up Kentucky fried chicken cos it reminded her

of her spotty skinny people's legs.

7. She got quality freebies from the Marketing dept of Industrial

strength bed springs and has earned "quite a reputation due to her

bedroom eyes and bouncy personality.

8. There's more of her.

9. She's got taste cos she exercises her taste buds more often.

10. She has morals..she never judges a man by the size of his wallet,

just his pantry.

11. Her latest achievement? She won the hunger strike!

12. She doesn't want to contribute to the world's starvation problem

13. She doesn't mean to belittle men. heh heh!

14. She's "Large" like they say in UK.(a comedian)

15. She's waiting for a slimmer of the year contract, bidding starts now.

16. She does her own marketing and PR as she eats the budget.

17. She's campaigning for bigger mansions, bigger cars and bigger....

18. She can get thinner (peer pressure denotes she can't milk this trend forever..pun intended)

19. Designers have their work cut out. She's their best customer

20. Her opinion of critics? She can get thinner. They get uglier.

21. She models for British Aerospace...there's no room in the dressing room for other models.

22. She's exclusively sexy. Unique, charming and adorable (oops own PR)

23. She has been accused of narcissism. Can she have cream with that?

24. She doesn't give a toss what anybody thinks of her. Right on Andicat! Bigger is Better.

Next year she's campaigning for skinnies, now where's that Slimming contract? Hello???!



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Reviewed by Baz
Reviewed on June 6, 2003
Her CD is very danceable and fun. Granted, her voice is mostly used to accent the rhythm but it's clear from the track "You Drive Me Crazy" that the girl can sing. Bravo Andicat

Reviewed by ginna sheldon
Reviewed on June 6, 2003
I think that she is darling. I'm a big girl myself. More power to her. Would love to hear one of her cd's

Reviewed by Judith Mullins
Reviewed on June 4, 2003
Best of luck. Beautiful photo and clever writing.

Reviewed by
Reviewed on June 1, 2003
You go for it andicat!

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