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Randall Davis Barfield

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And the Loser Is...
by Randall Davis Barfield   
Rated "G" by the Author.
     
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Losers or Losing situations, neither or both? You decide.


For many years I wrote very little and did not show what I wrote to anyone. It was an act of self-defense, basically. All of us have varying degrees of sensitivity to criticism and these can dictate our approach to writing and to submitting our writing. When we do go ahead and dare to put our writing on public display, we subject ourselves both to praise and criticism. Many times the latter proves burdensome. Some critics can be nasty in their comments. On Authorsden I was told by one reader that I was a loser, among other things. Quite some time has passed since that unkind remark, but I haven’t forgotten it. What’s more, I never even bothered to erase it. Also, that reader does not really know very much about me or about my life, so I took the remark lightly(or thought I did). Still, brain cells were stimulated, if you will, and today I’d like to comment briefly on this “loser/losing” business. In some ways, we all are losers as well as winners. No two days are alike nor are two circumstances. On the day of the death of a loved one, we can easily feel like a loser, yet on a specific day a few weeks later, we win a hundred dollars, say, and feel like a winner again(hopefully we’d felt that way more than not). I like the concept that there are no real “losers,” only losing situations or circumstances. For instance, a specific job that did not ever work out but another one that not only worked out but that was a joy. Many writers have pointed out this concept in the past. Robert Fulghum showed us that the writer of The Night Before Christmas was considered to be a loser if anything, but nowadays, knowing what we do about the author’s current state of immortality every Christmas season, who could consider him a loser? There are too many other cases to be able to cite here, but I think the point is made.We are often mean and petty regarding our comments to others. Teachers and others who work closely with children need to be especially careful to avoid “killing” the dreams and motivation of these future movers and shakers. Lastly, as we all know, multiple definitions exist for the terms losing and winning. If Liberace’s main goal was to play the piano in a highly-appreciated and beautiful style as well as to live well materially off the proceeds, then he was a winner. Likewise, losing could be identified as having failed to achieve an especially coveted goal one has. Why not? But both are made up of many components. Now I ask: Who is the real loser? For me, one type of loser is certainly that unhappy soul who has nothing better or more pressing to do in life than to spend her or his precious, irreplaceable time attempting to spot those whom she or he considers to be losers! Thanks for reading.The End  


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