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Anne B. McKee

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That Ole Devil Squirrel
by Anne B. McKee   
Rated "G" by the Author.
     
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That ole devil squirrel lives another day to torment the family cat, Miss Sara Bell.

685 words
The Meridian Star Newspaper
Meridian, Mississippi
January 8, 2005

THAT OLE DEVIL SQUIRREL
BY
ANNE MCKEE




You can count on him each and every morning – that ole devil squirrel. I’m pretty sure our cat Sara Belle would like for him to miss a day - every once in a while. You see that ole devil squirrel gets on her last nerve and then some. Actually that squirrel has a way with making my nerves jittery, too. But the way that the squirrel sees it, I’m sure; Sara Belle and I are on HIS property!!
Have you ever seen a squirrel lap a house round and around as he bobs his head into each window just to see what’s going on? Then come by my house very early one morning (any morning and ALWAYS very early!) to catch this motorized motion of fuzzy tail and fur. Now you have to look quick because he doesn’t tarry – it’s up and down, here and there, in and out, zig and zag – well….you get the fuzzy picture.
And by the time he has completed his early morning jog all around my cedar wood house our little Sara Belle is way past being fuzzed up! She is a nervous, shy type little black and white kitty anyways and with that ole devil squirrel in her face and on her heels well…..it’s not helping her social skills. When they are eyeball to eyeball it’s not a pretty sight although little Sara Belle has beautiful brilliant emerald green eyes. And, oh my, the bad squirrel is stuck with those little beady ugly brown eyeballs that seem to jump in and out of his sockets - but I suppose that’s not his fault.
I’m sure that he has a need and is just calling out for attention and help. Maybe he was orphaned at an early age or perhaps has a trauma beyond our comprehension. Oh there’s many reasons, I’m sure, that would make him become a constant pest and with a continuous drive to harass our little Sara Belle. He just needs understanding or a “whupping” - maybe both! One thing for sure he’s not going away so we might as well deal with him and there’s just got to be some good there somewhere amongst those beady eyes and fuzzy tail – somewhere.
So this morning Sara Belle and I contrived a plan – a plan of outsmarting that ole devil squirrel. We decided if you can’t “beat’em” then “join’em” or at least make him think you are joining him. She and I waited quietly for the fuzzy one to begin his morning jog around our house. We didn’t have to wait long because he is very punctual. As he began his climb to our very large kitchen window (which seems to be his very favorite perch) staying out of sight, I gently swayed Sara Belle all around the windowsill. When he darted – she darted and when he zagged – she zagged and all at the same time with the fiercest stare and profound growl that she could muster. Her little heart was thudding awful hard but she pulled it off like a true champ. She and I peeped breathlessly out into the yard as we witnessed the squirrel turning his head from side to side just trying to figure out who was the big, bad black and white squirrel that had suddenly moved into HIS house. He seemed to ponder over this unexpected event for just a few minutes and then pounced on top of the new birdhouse and feeder that we had just purchased for the front yard.
Our apologies to all of the neighborhood birds for we are awfully sorry this has happened. We would offer you our best advice concerning the bad habits of that ole devil squirrel but we are due some down time, some quite time because we are sure he’ll be back – then it’s back to the fuzzy drawing board. Somehow……. I don’t think he will fall for the big bad black and white squirrel trick again, nope not again – we’re just going to have to get more fuzzy creative - but we can, ….. maybe.


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