The past is the present, or so it seems at times. I am swept away by the sweet power of my lover only to wake up and realize I was dreaming again. Looking back, I marvel that I found the love of four men when I struggled to find myself. All of my loves and dreams helped me grow from an innocent teenager into the woman I am today, and so I continue to dream...or perhaps I am living the dream.

Cantaloupe Dance

Kellie Jameson
iUniverse (2006)
ISBN 9780595409723
Reviewed by Debra Gaynor for Reader Views (11/06)


This is the story of a woman searching for love.  Just as it seems to be within her grasp it elusively slips away.  Noella Parker is a woman longing to be loved.  Just as she thinks she’s found love one man, Jansen keeps walking through her life.  They have a connection that can’t be completely severed.  When things didn’t work out between them, they both tried to move on with their lives.  The next man in her life is Ben.  Four hours after meeting Ben, Noella is sure that she’s in love again.  “He kissed me with a passion I hadn’t felt since Jansen.”  But Jansen was always in the background and still made an occasional appearance. 

The next love of her life was Josh.  This relationship leads to a fruitless marriage. “The months passed by quickly, and I fell in love, as expected with Josh.”  Soon they were married but the shadow of Jansen again looms in the background.  Jansen still haunts Noella’s dreams and desires. “I hate that I get excited to see you.  I fall asleep next to my husband each night, knowing the end is right around the corner.  I know we won’t last long.  We both want such different things.” 

The years fell away when Noella opened the door to James, her boyfriend before Jansen.  Once again Noella is in love, unfortunately James is married with child.  That little technicality doesn’t stop their love for each other.  Painfully, Noella releases him to return to his family. 

This book is not really about a woman searching for love, nor is it about a man and woman in love.  This book is about a woman learning to let go.  Learning to let go of the idea of love.  It is only when she can hold love in an open hand that she can truly possess it.  A closed fist will crush it.

The message behind this story is touching.  Noella is a strong character, one that I identified with a little too much.  The men are handsome, loving, and very sensitive.  Ben was my favorite.  My least favorite is James.  I won’t go into details because it would give away too much of the book.  Ms Jameson successfully demonstrates the need to learn to release those you love.  If it’s meant to be they will return.

The cover of this book could be improved with a touch of color.  The print is a nice size and easy to read.  Ms Jameson, your book has left me pondering.   I believe I will be considering the “moral of the story” for quite sometime.  I highly recommend this book to those who enjoy books about relationships, romance, fiction, and books that teach you to search yourself.