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An Epiphany?
Okay, so you know those feelings and memories that you fight with all your might to keep bottled up and forgotten? Those feelings that, as hard as you try to suppress them, they are very persistent and very much present? I figure, if they are going to be so annoying and persistent there must be a reason...then I thought, Why not pop the cork on that bottle and open the lid on that box, and let them out...
The feeling of ultimate depression and sadness only lasts a few minutes but after reading that list of mistakes, happenings and conversations, and checking it twice...I found that not all of them are as bad as I thought. Some memories I had forgotten are returned to me. They aren't as wonderful as I had ignorantly hoped they would be, But that's the price you pay for telling yourself the truth and not knowing what to expect. That original feeling is replaced by a succession of emptiness to a feeling of calm. Whether that is a calm before a mental storm, I'm not sure. But I sure feel good for having let myself in on my own secrets. I find that, harder than keeping secrets from others, is keeping them from yourself. I would not advise continuing that if you are, no matter the secret. You will be immensely happier for betraying your secrets to yourself. You won't feel guilty for telling them, either. I promise.
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