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  Home > Humor > Articles Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry      Authors: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z     

By George xx xx

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Are you out of your mind?

Hinkly Dinkly Reporting
Standby For News!

Headline
CATASTROPHIC BOATING ACCIDENT

Okefenokee Swamp,…Phil Swift, the Flex-Seal Guy, barely escaped injury or death, when the boat he was riding in, fell apart for no apparent reason.

The defunct vessel sank like a rock and Phil was left flinging and flailing his arms around yelling that he can’t swim.

A passer-by, passed by and told him the water was only 3 feet deep.
Phil stood up and walked to shore, where he was bitten by an alligator.

The alligator was thought to be non-poisonous, however Phil was given rabies shots, (Just to be sure.)

Phil was asked if he wanted the bite closed with Flex-Seal?

“Are you out of your mind?…Give me Crazy Glue!”

Hinkly Out,
By George
NoPo8


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Reviewed by Ronald Hull
Reviewed on May 22, 2020
The boat probably failed because the Duck Tape he was using needed WD-40 to oil it like duck feathers so that it would float high and dry, not sink soggily.

Come to think of it, a little DDT on that alligator bite before closing it with crampons should kill the voracious infection of the flesh eating bacteria.

Bye, George,

Ron

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