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  Home > Humor > Articles Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry      Authors: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z     

By George xx xx

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Lizzie Borden
by By George xx xx   
Rated "G" by the Author.
     
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I think she did it.

Dr. Swigmon Fwad, Kiwi

I think she did it…What do you think?

KUDOS to Lizzie who stumped the prosecutors.

The case of Lizzie Borden, is another where justice failed. We should like to think that today such an horrific event would not go unpunished. Yet I wonder?

Several questions remain unanswered…

Was she allowed to keep the axe?
I suppose not, due to evidence and that sort of thing, but it may have been returned after the trial?
Hardware stores cleared their shelves when they saw her approaching.
She tried to order several from a mail order catalog. However mail order, in those days, was not what it is today.
One thing is certain, nobody else was murdered in such a bloody fashion.

Her and her sister were orphans with nobody offering to adopt them, for obvious reasons. Male suitors were rare and distant, for the same reasons. Friends invited for “tea and crumpets,” never showed up.

After the deaths of their parents, Lizzie and her sister, being quite wealthy, moved to an influential part of town suggesting the murders may have been done so they could acquire indoor plumbing?
However Lizzie claimed the reason for the change was because of constant harassment.

Lizzie Borden took an axe
And gave her mother forty whacks.
When she saw what she had done,
She gave her father forty-one.

The jingle was a popular rope-skipping melody that children sung outside their home after the murders, with Lizzie leaning out of the window and screaming it was a bit of an exaggeration, which it was.

Another interesting fact...
Lizzie's middle name was Andrew. A little tidbit that probably caused friction for her and her dad, who obviously wanted a son.


I believe she did it, and would no doubt answer the “Second Funeral” scenario as a Cold Blooded Killer, which she was.

Swigmon Out,
By George
NoPo8
  


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Reviewed by Ronald Hull
Reviewed on May 31, 2020
At times like these, when everybody is wondering what the outcome of the latest, obviously whodunit, but why? Because his name was George?

It is so refreshing to hear you bring back that forever haunting tale of Lizzie Borden and her axe. And who hasn't heard that little rhyme?

Thank you for all the details that make it all the more clear why Lizzie did it, if she did it.

Bye, George,

Ron

Reviewed by E Phillips
Reviewed on May 31, 2020
I remember more of that catchy tune...

But you can't chop your poppa up in Massachusetts
And then blame all the damage on the mice
No you can't chop your poppa up in Massachusetts
That sort of thing just isn't very nice.
Close the door, lock and latch it
Here comes Lizzie with a brand new hatchet!

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