Great construction, every line has a clear purpose in this poem. I like the way the title comes at the heart of your poem and the lines
"an exploration of self
[doubt by another name]"
say a lot.
To engineer fate... I believe the only way to do that is to make those (forbidden in my home) statements like... "It can't get any w...." (I REALLY don't allow those statements! hee, hee...) or "What else could go wro..?" No... to tempt fate is not a good thing, and engineering it isn't either. :~) It just doesn't work...
Enjoyable write. I liked the format of it too. The second and third to the last lines are my favorite...
Cryssa
(and if something bad happens today because I wrote most of those forbidden phrases I will know who to blame!) :~)
Great structure, this poem. I love "it was so for a season-" as a lead-in line. It pulls the reader in, and then states its case. Then you follow up with little asides, that let us know you're sane after all (so glad to know that. Sanity is highly under-rated in poets). Anyway, I love the symbolic elements in here: The getting burned at the stake, and the nailing hearts to doors... and your line "to keep warm" is shocking (in a dark Sam McGeeish way). And I love it. And your message comes out loud and clear, that you cannot put off the death of something meant to die. Not for long. It just feels/gets/means/is wrong. --Charlie
Reviewed by blue soplain (Reader)
Reviewed on March 27, 2008
egads this is spiraling deep. ...
an open wound of leftover relations, of hearts bound/burned together; a personal witch trial, where either way, youre doomed.. .so well crafted.
~ness
Contraband Marriage, traveling along the hemline of loving after incarceration, is a love story written in lyric and free form, set in reality with a different ever after.
(Self-published. Please contact author directly to order.)
Enter the pages of diaspora in quiet introspection. Bathe your thoughts with subtle humor; synchronize your spirit-sense with history-in-heat; fall headlong with eyes wide open into
What excellent comments on people and the things we do to ourselves, to our world.
Excellent.
Terry
"an exploration of self
[doubt by another name]"
say a lot.
Axilea
Be always safe,
Karen
Enjoyable write. I liked the format of it too. The second and third to the last lines are my favorite...
Cryssa
(and if something bad happens today because I wrote most of those forbidden phrases I will know who to blame!) :~)
(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.
an open wound of leftover relations, of hearts bound/burned together; a personal witch trial, where either way, youre doomed.. .so well crafted.
~ness
randy