Pretty Red Rubber Bladder

auctioneer said
the hot water bottle
was feminine the linen
cover went with it

like hell it is!
I'm not the barbie
doll type I bid a dollar
prettiest red rubber bladder
in teller county madam pearl devere
would've caused a scandal back in 1896
cripple creek burned to the ground with what
I did filled it with a fifth of whiskey licked the rim
patted my crotch tied it on my horse and waved my
middle finger to the crowd

you were
standing over
there by the wagon
wheels looking at the
ground your broken spoke
couldn't be any more fixed
what it was you needed was to
pat my crotch and lay into the bladder
and I told you so

so we
go across
the prairie
on horses with
your four dogs chasing
pheasants up ahead of us
your boots made for the stirrups
and I thought if you rode me the way
you had control of the saddle when we got
to wherever it was we were going I'd take it
out in trade but I wouldn't let loose of my bladder
and I told you so

but you
had to go
and after we
both shared a drink
from my pretty red rubber
bladder it's why we can laugh
all the way to the bank and when
somebody pisses us off it doesn't
matter because it's all about what's
in the heart and the whiskey in the bladder
your wallet's full now let's go and spend it!

Copyright Ms. Sage Sweetwater, Celebrity firebrand lesbian novelist