when i was 10 my grandfather died.
in that cemetry two of his sisters were buried and i thought he would be buried with them but he wasnt... he was laid to rest with the soldiers and i was so angry... separating family and all... i was 10 lol.
are the forgotten of this piece those who faught for their country. who came home victoriously and died forgotten... tucked away in some retirement home with their 'back in my day...' stories that no one wanted to hear... that everyone should have heard...?
i think your meter in this piece kills me.
it has such a natural pace at which to read but it never continues... almost like a hymn thats verses end too early.
i dont know if that makes any sense or whether you can hear that at all but yeah... if you have any idea what im on about i think a coupla minor adjustments would make this piece flow better...
i knew a lady who used to go out to the cemetry every christmas and place little posies on every grave so no one would be without love at christmas...
If you tend to believe romantic, passionate, masculine poetry is a thing of past eras, read "She Intrigues Me," and be swept away in the beautiful craft of a contemporary poet of love.
in that cemetry two of his sisters were buried and i thought he would be buried with them but he wasnt... he was laid to rest with the soldiers and i was so angry... separating family and all... i was 10 lol.
are the forgotten of this piece those who faught for their country. who came home victoriously and died forgotten... tucked away in some retirement home with their 'back in my day...' stories that no one wanted to hear... that everyone should have heard...?
i think your meter in this piece kills me.
it has such a natural pace at which to read but it never continues... almost like a hymn thats verses end too early.
i dont know if that makes any sense or whether you can hear that at all but yeah... if you have any idea what im on about i think a coupla minor adjustments would make this piece flow better...
i knew a lady who used to go out to the cemetry every christmas and place little posies on every grave so no one would be without love at christmas...
beautiful =)
Be safe,
Karen