Do you want your daddy to be your daddy in your next life?

Somebody on Facebook has been sharing this same question with everyone and the question has been shared many times by others.

I wanted to say yes but seemed my inner child says no.

The reason is that I was raised by my grandparents (my mom's parents) from birth until I was almost 7 years old. I spent my kindergarten years with my grandparents. I think it was because I was a girl.

I was only shipped back to live in our big house with my Daddy and Mommy and Daddy's parents after my grandfather (my mom's dad) died.

From then on I had always felt like an invisible person since my oldest brother and my oldest sister had taken up the two favorite spots in the family. I felt like no one had given me the attention that I needed.

When I was living in Mom's parents' house, Grandpa often called me his "Lucky Star" and showered me with a lot of attention. I missed him so much on the day that he would not wake up from his sleep. I remember painfully waiting for Grandpa to wake up to ask me to give him a kiss on his cheek. I waited and waited, but Grandpa would not wake up, and no one was telling me what was happening.

My grandfather had six wives but I only knew three. The others must have died already before I was born. My biological grandmother was number 5.

On that day I woke up to find all the Grandmas were crying. I did not know what was happening so I could not bring myself to tears. One of the Grandmas noticed my dry eyes and scolded me, "Look at that girl! Grandpa loved her so much but she doesn't shed a tear!"

I was devastated. Fear was creeping up my spine. I did not know what was wrong with Grandpa but I feared he may never wake up to hold me again. It took me a long while to finally realize that Grandpa was gone and he would not wake up again.

Then I was transferred back to live with my Mom and Dad and my other siblings. And even though I was loved by my grandmother (my dad's mom), it was painful to learn that they did not want me when I was born.

So, my answer to the question is, "No, I would not want my Daddy to be my Daddy in my next life."

In my next life, I want to be loved by my Daddy right from birth. I want my Daddy to be rich and caring. I want my Daddy not to have to suffer from any hardships in his life. I want my next Daddy to be perfect, and I want him to pamper me right from birth until... forever.

Don't get me wrong, I love my Daddy, and I know he loved me too. But our relationship didn't develop until my parents moved to Canada during the last 16 years of their lives.

My childhood in our big house was not always pleasant, but Daddy did all he could to make us feel comfortable. He had to work most of the time to keep up with the household expense.

I love my daddy, but perhaps I would not want him to be my Daddy again in my next life. It is because I do not want to see my Daddy suffer the hardship again and I do not want myself to suffer from the same "invisible" experience while I was growing up. I want a Daddy who will pamper me and love me right from the moment I was born.

~ Sandie May Joyce, 06/16/2023