All too often, too many of us spend our days never thinking of the sacrifice made for us that we might live in such peace. One day, Jenny experiences a tiny moment that makes her realise this and changes her life forever.
Enjoyed reading a fellow Murphy's writing.
Just one question: What exactly is "Anzac history"? Just wondering (I'm American). I get the general idea but don't get the particulars.
Nice short story. Good plot but needs a little more life. Played the stress of Jenny nicely but the conflict was resolved much too quickly at the end. All the sudden everything is good and their marriage is saved and she's famous.
Some observations:
Good intro with leaving the reader hanging at the end of the first paragraph.
Glitch with instaneous instead of instantaneous in paragraph two.
Chris appears in the fifth paragraph wihout a prelude or explanation. Don't find out who he is until the third page. Who's Dave on the 10th paragraph of page three? Take it that's just a glitch for Chris.
There's a glitch on page 4, second paragraph and fourth with bought instead of brought. Also, a glitch in 6th para., 4th page with down instead of done.
Redundant "Charissa told her daughter" on the last page.
Suggest a colon or dash to seperate "Lest We Forget" at the end of the story. Needs some extra emphasis.
Suspenseful and close to home, Rain of Deception 2 will leave you in Tears. Much like Part 1, this will shocking sequel will keep you on the edge of your fingertips.
