The Spiritual Question of Our Time

By

Bill Cottringer

     The world seems to be at a crossroads today from historically recurring dilemmas—free will vs. determinism, idealism vs. realism, theory vs. pragmatism, selfishness vs. selflessness, success vs. failure, creation vs, evolution and all the other us vs. life, us vs. them and us vs. ourselves conflicts in life. A very serious spiritual question we are all asking is this:  If I get in in deep dark hole with no way out, is it a cop-out to lie down and ask life to deliver me to safety?

    We have all been here and have our sad stories to tell. Unfortunately I have had too many. But maybe I have learned some things worth passing on. At least I am hoping so. The one thing that sticks with me most is that the only time you can let go in lying down and completely trusting life to deliver you to somewhere better, is when you can look yourself square in the mirror and convince yourself you have done all you can do to position yourself to get where you need to be to have a realistic opportunity to have a choice that will result in the best outcome waiting for you in your journey. Getting to this point is full of doubts, but when you get there, you know it.

     This is coming from deep in my heart, so I think I should pause and recognize the people who have influenced my thinking the most, how they did that, and what it means to this essay. Here they are in no particular order:

Jesus:  Jesus gave us all the most important guideline how to avoid needless failure and achieve desirable success, with The Golden Rule—“Do unto others as you shall have them do unto you.” This simple rule magnificently and wisely covers all situations. Nothing can be added or subtracted for better results. It works because of the underlying reality that whatever you do to others, you are really doing to yourself. Enough said.

Alan Watts:  Alan Watts was an Episcopal Priest with a Buddhist mentality. I think the most important things he revealed were: (a) You can only become free when you stop relying on anything and everything that provides you with a false sense of security (no matter how sacred it is), and (b) Language has helped us divide the world in half—into this and that dualistic polar opposite; we must use our minds to reconcile these things to understand that they are just different sides to the same coin.The truth is always somewhere in the middle.

Paul Tillich:   This brilliant Christian writer exposed the only two real basic drives in the whole universe—to separate from the oneness into different uniqueness and to rejoin the oneness to sameness in union. This explains all the movement we are part of in life and knowing both are necessary, stops false judgment of all the polar opposites of good and bad, pleasure and pain, and desirable and undesirable.As Dolly Parton says, "It is the rain and sun that make rainbows."

Stephen Covey: The admonition Stephen Covey gave to me personally one time was something I will never forget: Getting to the top rung of your ladder and finding out you have placed it against the wrong building is not the best time to find that out. But, I have my own saying about this--"Better late than never."

Bob Wohlgemuth: Bob is my best friend ever and all I can do is thank him from his grave. He and I survived 2 weeks with maximum security inmates at Marion Federal Penitentiary trying to strip us of our defenses in a therapeutic milieu for inmates and therapists; they didn’t succeed because we joined forces in a forever friendship. Bob left me with two great eternal thoughts: (a) The difficulty in life is the choice (b) If you can’t keep an open mind, are you sure you have one? I do!

Anil Bhatnagar: My writer friend from India, Anil,  and I have been debating free will vs. determinism for decades after our articles about the value changes in life coming from the Information Age, appeared on both sides of Barbara Bush’s article in Executive Excellence magazine. I backed off of my own preference for aggressive bad Karma intervention, when he said, “If you are born an orange tree, then you can be the best orange tree in the fruit orchard, but forget about being a giant oak tree, a flowering dogwood or apple tree somewhere else. And be grateful you are not a weed in a cow pasture.

Albert Siedlecki:  AL and I went to college together in Kentucky in the late 60’s. As a dedicated teacher for over 4 decades, he somehow reconciled science and religion. And for a devout Catholic that is quite an intellectual accomplishment. He keeps me from wandering off on the wrong path now and then and that is a very valuable function of a true friend.

Marcus Mann:  Marcus and I crossed paths in teaching police supervision at the Washington State Police Academy in the 90’s and reconnected when we were both involved in homeland security training in the private sector. Marcus was able to do what many people can’t. He used will power, friendship and spirituality to get out of his dark hole and is now enjoying the abundance of the light. We write Forewords to each other’s books, like Anil and I do.

Van Sloan: Van and I accidentally met when my “likeability” research bumped into his “social quotient" research.  We were both working on finding the “one thing” that accounted for success and wasn’t as discriminating at traditional IQ measures. This was all before the importance of emotional intelligence came to the forefront. Van is an admirable model to bring needed equality to society. His life's work is making a difference.

Christie Dobson: Christie is my step-daughter having the admirable courage to go back to school and complete a Ph.D. at Kansas University at age 48 to lead the way in closing the gap in the great divide between people who have and can do and people who don’t. Her passion is an inspiration and we may be each other’s silent muses, or at least cheerleaders to keep doing what we are doing to make a difference.

Winnie the Pooh: This most wonderful literary character provided the impetus for my ridiculous book “Do What Matters Most” which wasted 650 pages to say what does matter most according to the Tao of Pooh: The three F’s—family, friends and fun. Pretty simple, just like Pooh’s relationship with Christopher Robin.

    When you seem to be approaching a deep dark hole with no way out, first stop digging. Then take inventory and make sure you have done all you can to earn the right  and deserve to be rescued by life, with more patience than you have ever had. Then give in to that trust you have always had. Smile and appreciate the results when you get to the other side of the darkness.Finally share your secret of success with others, when they ask.