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Tom poesyco.th@gmail.com

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FLIES ?
by Tom poesyco.th@gmail.com   
Rated "G" by the Author.
     
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DO YOU HAVE A 'PET PEEVE' ABOUT PESTS ?





FLIES ?

Tom Hyland - (C) - 11/2/15


House-Flies - Horse-Flies - She-Flies - Tse-Tse Flies ...

HATE 'EM!

All of 'em ...

HOUSE-FLIES ...
Are basically little Pests ...
That fly around, buzzing, landing, sampling your Food ...
YUCK!

Who knows where these little Bastards have Been?
Outside on Doggie-Doo?
In Garbage Cans?
Carriers of Who-Knows-What GERMS!

These lil Mov'vas are pretty Sharp ...
Hang around outside your entrance Door ...
You open it and go In ...
And So Do They!

About a week ago, one lil Sucker ...
Was pesterin' the Hell out'ta me ...
Killed him with a Rubber Band ,,, WHAP!

Lo and Behold, another brother, or sister?
Quickly took his place ...
Buzz - Buzz - Buzz ...
WHAP!

The Two other ways of killin' these Suckers are ...
Both hands Clapped together, Above ...
As the Fly usually Jumps Straight Up ...
WHAP!

Or ... you come from the Side ...
With one hand Cupped ...
Swiftly Swiping across Above him ...
If Caught ... you just Squeeze your hand Tightly ...
And SQUASH the SOB!

So far, I Got Two out of Three, here in my Trailer ...
The Last Lil Pest, Whom I Named ELMER ...
Is still Drivin' me Nuts, as I sit here and Type!
Hopefully tonite he will be Tired ...
And Slower ...
And Will Meet His Maker!

All Three Methods require Years n' Years of Practice ...
To become a Proficient "Little Game" Hunter!

P.S. Wash Hands Thoroughly After the KILL!


HORSE-FLIES ...
Similar 'Game' just Bigger, Louder, Pestier ...
They are mostly outside Critters ...
Usually Prevalent around Barns ...
They Love Horse-Manure!

Employ Same Tactics to Stalk, and/or Hunt!
A Tad Messier to Clean Off!

SHE-FLIES ...
This is a 'Nick-Name' I learned as a Kid ...
When Down E' O'cean, Hon!
Big Bastards That BITE!

Sometimes, an Ugly Brown n' Black Color ...
Others may be a Bright Shiny Green ...
You can be waist-deep in Salty Water ...
If one or more Targets You ...
Get The Hell Out of Dodge!
They Hurt!

TSETSE FLIES ...
Luckily, never ever around these Dangerous Bastards ...
THEY CAUSE MALARIA!

Don't MESS with Them!


Well Pilgrims, that's about It ...
It's 12:12 am on Tuesday, 11/3 ...
And I'm finished with my Discourse ...

Oh ... yeah ...

Ole 'Elmer' never showed up, So ...

I guess the 'Safari' will continue after I get ...
'40 Winks' ...


FLIES ?

THE DEVIL'S LITTLE DISEASE CARRIERS ?


(C) - TKH.



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Reviewed by m j hollingshead
Reviewed on November 23, 2015

not too crazy about the pesky beasts either
well said

Reviewed by Mr. Ed
Reviewed on November 4, 2015
Who knows where these little Bastards have Been?

Outside on Doggie-Doo?

In Garbage Cans?

Carriers of Who-Knows-What GERMS!



Wow, for a minute there I thought you were talking about one of these pesty old Jersey Devils that I keep reading about, not flies!

Reviewed by Ronald Hull
Reviewed on November 3, 2015
The ones you call "she-flies" I think are what we call deer flies because they inhabit wooded lake areas and pester the hell out of deer in the summertime. They have a nasty way of biting and sucking blood like a mosquito. The only thing that bites worse is the larger, horsefly.

Fortunately, I've never been, "Naked and Afraid," but according to the television series, so far none of the victims have encountered tsetse flies, but they have encountered sand flies and find them to be really nasty little buggers.

As I write this, a small knat or fruit fly has landed on my computer monitor and soon will attack my eyes. Since I can't grab anything to swat with, my swatting ability is very limited and I find that flies and mosquitoes have a field day on my body without help from my protectors. So, I try to stay out of pestering situations. I would advise you to quit dragging cow shit into your trailer when you come back from the barn. ;-)

Ron

Reviewed on November 3, 2015
Eeeeewwwww!!!! I hate flies as well. Thanks for the tip about holding your hands in wait above them!! I will try that. Happy hunting!

Love ya!

Jane

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