Those dreaded Raptors are back with a vengeance in Jurassic Park III. More bad news --- they’ve brought along even more deadly friends. Tremendous progress has been achieved since Jurassic Park II, so these genetically engineered creatures can now communicate with each other! Making matters worse, the other dinosaurs also seem to talk together. Because I’m not multi-lingual (and no subtitles were shown), I was forced to call on Dr. Dolittle for a translation. Having just seen the movie himself, the good doctor appeared eager to help. (Warning: spoilers from this point on.)

I asked Dr. Dolittle first about that huge Spinosaurus who destroyed an aircraft in one of the movie’s early scenes. Passengers in danger included Dr. Grant (Sam Neill again from The Lost World: Jurassic Park II), his assistant (Alessandro Nivola from Face/Off), parents searching for their lost son (William H. Macy and Tea Leoni from Fargo and Family Man), and their crew. "What did the creature say when he went after that group so viciously?" I inquired.

"Well, that Spiny was one scary dude," Dr. Dolittle replied. "He hadn’t tasted food for a long time, so he felt happy about the possibility of a good meal. The Spinosauruses are carnivorous, you know. This one couldn’t help commenting out loud, ‘There’s my dinner!’"

"Yeah, I noticed how angry he got when the T-Rex got in his way," I said. "And what about those Velociraptors who circled the humans when they discovered some dinosaur eggs were missing? From the sounds of so much crying in the theater during the screening I saw, there’s a scene that really frightened most little children! The Raptors looked like they were carrying on a lively discussion, but I couldn’t understand a word of it."

"Still, you had to recognize the Velociraptors wanted those precious eggs back. But what you probably missed is their argument about which of the people to eat first as well as who should begin the feast," explained Dr. Dolittle.

Trying to hide my amazement, I uttered a simple "I didn’t pick up on that. No wonder those castaways showed such fear." Then, in an attempt to downplay my lack of inter-species communication skills, I added, "It was perfectly clear, however, when one of the bird-like Pteronodons wanted a terrified boy (Trevor Morgan from The Patriot) as nutrition for her young."

Dr. Dolittle nodded vigorously. "You’re right. But did you catch the mother’s warning to her chicks as she scolded them about not playing with their food?"

"No, I didn’t. Hey, I couldn’t even figure out what the flock of Pteronodons were shouting at those pitiful humans while flying away from their first nesting place."

Smiling at my naiveté, Dr. Dolittle declared, "That’s easy; they were all yelling, ‘We’re still gonna get you, sucka! Just wait for Jurassic Park IV.’"

(Released by Universal Pictures and Amblin Entertainment in 2001; rated "PG-13" for scenes of intense sci-fi terror and violence. Definitely not for the pre-school set.)

Review also posted at ReelTalk Movie Reviews.