Rest in Peace Nanny

I miss you so much now that you’re so far away, it’s hard to function and go on with each day

I know your soul is in a much better place, but my body is exhausted from all the tears covering my face.

I wake up each morning wishing you were here, as I go through each day my heart breaks your not there

I miss your smile, sweet and innocent, and the way your eyes lit so bright as I walked through the doors of the nursing home each day.

My mind often wonders if the pain will ever stop and I will be able to go through just one day without all these tears that drop.

It’s so hard to drag myself out of bed each day facing the reality that you are gone.

I pray the lord you are happy and he forgives me for what I did wrong

I got sick and was forced into an extended hospital stay

I made you a promise I would be there with you everyday to hold your hand and stay with you until you fell asleep at night in your bed

During my time in the hospital you started to give up and we did the impossible

You got really sick and so did I

Our fevers both became dangerously high

We both got better at the same time; because you gave me your strength and I gave you mine

On the last days of your life I sat and held your hand I knew I was losing you and you losing me as our tears met in a pool on our hands

I told you stories and sang you songs and you were afraid no more to go to the light and carry on

We buried you casket the other day and I gave you a heart necklace, mom and I have one too so our hearts will be connected you will always be with us and us with you

I filled you casket with some candy, uncle Joe did too so your new special chair in heaven will have snacks you can stash away like I remember you used to do.

My beautiful nanny I miss you so much life with you gone will never be the same without your warm gentle touch

I will miss those soft fuzzy cheeks I kissed every time we would leave

I miss the way you would say “BreANN” whenever I aggravated you or I would be late for a visit.

Oh how I wish I could hear you say it one more time

You used to love when I was there to give you a tubby I would play a game so we could wash your toes and I always made the mistake of giving you the shower hose.

You would smile from ear to ear and laugh like crazy when my face got soaked as you sprayed my body from head to toe...

When I saw that beautiful smile and finally got you to laugh, it was the greatest gift god could ever give me.

I would do anything in the world just to get you to smile or laugh, even if it was just for a second it was worth its weight in gold

Each time your tubby was through the nurses and aids would laugh as the say “oh she got you good”

We used to have so much fun together no matter what we were doing

But now you are gone my fun has stopped forever it will never be the same without you here…

©Breanna Martel