This is lovingly dedicated to a 1970 Mercury Comet...truly a lemon.

Look, I know I've called you names'
Like "junk heap" and "the bomb",
But that's okay, it's all right
You're in safe hands, I'm calm.
Just remember who feeds you gasoline
And treats you to STP
If you have any morals at all,
You won't just up and leave me.
The mechanic is looking worried,
Oh Comet, open those perky headlights!
You've got to show a little hint of life
The mechanic's reading you the last rites!
Just recall all of our good times
Like when you fought to reach Hilltop Market...
And don't forget how I loyally defended you
When kids laughed, asking, "Lady, why don't you just park it?"
The mechanic suggests that I shoot you,
Relieve you of your misery and woe,
Yet I don't think I can bear it---
So let's show them your get up and go!
Okay, so it went, but I'm angry now
I've already spent enough.
I know that you aren't well
But on me it's been real tough.
The mechanic is losing patience.
"Lady, I can't make it run!"
Looking into those closed headlights,
I know I must mumble...
"Oh, just give me a gun!"