When it’s left herringbone tyre tracks
all across your back –
(s)he loves me, (s)he loves me not –
and run livid talons
across your offered cheek;
when your face is black and blue
with the pounding from its twilight zone,
and your veins shot through with the
highs and lows of its addiction.
Then do you know that love is
a killer on the loose,
sharpening its blade on
the steel of your desire,
polishing both barrels with your
phantom caress;
leaving you hopelessly
tied to its tracks,
your ear to the rails,
breathlessly awaiting
the sound of its coming.
Hoping for a painless end;
desperate for its blameless
resurrection.
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Reviews of "Un)Fair Game"
Reviewed by Ruth Rey (Reader)
Reviewed on August 18, 2007
Brilliant, rough, very emotional/intelligent poem. I love the first stanza role-switching.
And in your bio you say you don't have much to say! Yoho yoho....
Sunnies,
Deborah
Love hurts... I hated that maudlin song while knowing it was a good lyric. Yep, kate, you've seen it bite - love is a killer. What's that line.. only love can break your heart and only love can put it right, something along those poignant lines. And then there's the guru who warns us against emotionalism, that's not love, he admonishes. Love with detachment, love is a state-of-being, being in love is a different matter. There ain't no cure for love, sang doleful leonard Cohen. My thoughts on love, it comes when you least expect it and it's best of all when it goes both ways. Love, love, love, all you need is love.... and a bit of horse sense to stay in the saddle. Wishing you, Kate, a lotta love! And humour to see the ridiculousness of wanting too much.
Wow this was certainly a spine gripper for a second, all types of images were conjured up in my head
"Then do you know that love is
a killer on the loose,
sharpening its blade on
the steel of your desire,.."
Certainly powerful Kate, believe this sets off some sparks all the way around, wooo!
Kate - Your composition is a public service. In its lines there are lessons and crucial advice to those who often don't stop to see truth written on every object around them. Perhaps, I'm missing some of the nuances and hints, but I see enough to know that this work is a definite classic. Thanks, and please be careful with whatever that stuff is you're drinking... lately. - Bill
This is a hardhitting poem, a great read! I liked the blade sharpening image, and how it describes the darker side of love (if that is the word).
In S1 while I see that "(s)he loves me, (s)he loves me not" is used as appositive, but think that there might be a subject verb disagreement in the whole stanza ("it" and "run").
D
Reviewed by Andy Turner (Reader)
Reviewed on August 14, 2007
Pure brilliance ole pal...
To love has its price, but not to love is not to live...
and not to live is not to love...
Wow! Your voice in this one is so powerful Kate it jumps off the page! You cover the many sides of love yet hone it finely down to the
awesome thriller that it is if once it captures us we yearn after it no matter the cost. methinks it the greatest of mysteries;-) fantastic work!
Kate, wow, this one grabbed me right around the neck!! I'd say love can hurt just like you've described in this poem...if we allow it to. Oft time lovers, love to torture to see what can be gained and how long it will be tolerated. This is a powerful power.
For this is why the phoenix was invented and given genetic ressurection DNA in the aviary family, God and Audubon...railroad iron is shiny for a reason...the lover's train burns off the dross and the phoenix buffs the rail for a new ride, highs and lows and bi-sexual whistles blow off some steam...going both ways - meet you at the train station, KB..."I hear the train a comin' - it's comin' 'round the bend (JC)
oh my...now this is love! Powerful write and while the imagery is unusual, this is one of the best pieces I have read recently illustrating the nature of love...kind of a walk on the dark side.
No one writes 'em like you do: hard hitting, in your face truths in painful lines. Only one who has been hurt can truly write/understand. And I do. (((HUGS))) You've made me cry--
Those ties can sometimes be too binding where escaping is only a hope but actually not an option. Fair or unfair the game can only be played with the resources which we are provided with. Blessings Always, Paul.
Hey, People! Thank you for all your thoughts. I have been fascintated this week with all the parenthesising in titles that I have seen crop up in the Poetry Listing here. I decided to have a go with it, and am amazed how this adds so much to shade and nouance of meaning if you toss in the added ambiguity in this way. I have edited this today, making the implication bi-sexual (if you get my drift!) and feel, just by doing that, that, like a prism, this projects certain other layers of interpretation. Thanks for listening... just speaking my thoughts on the poetic process aloud here. Have a nice day! :)) Love, Kate xx
Dear sweet Kate, though love often seems to be like all of your horrific descriptions and more it is also the tender caress of a hand in the dark, an unexpected kiss from behind, a simple sacrifice such as who gets the last cookie...all of these and more that certainly balance the slashes and gashes that oftne accompany love. Great write here sweet Kate. Loved it.
Big hugs
Fee
Reviewed by Missy Cross (Reader)
Reviewed on August 13, 2007
O, Kate, WOW. This is, just, I'm in awe. What a work - your pen is like a weapon here, opening wounds that were a delight to receive.
The treasure that is love needs a man that protects every silky thread of her existance. Your poem has that touch of tragic love. One that leaves her dreaming of another place and time. Much emotion in this art.
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And in your bio you say you don't have much to say! Yoho yoho....
Sunnies,
Deborah
"Then do you know that love is
a killer on the loose,
sharpening its blade on
the steel of your desire,.."
Certainly powerful Kate, believe this sets off some sparks all the way around, wooo!
Blessings and take care,
~Gwendolyn
Love Tinka
In S1 while I see that "(s)he loves me, (s)he loves me not" is used as appositive, but think that there might be a subject verb disagreement in the whole stanza ("it" and "run").
D
To love has its price, but not to love is not to live...
and not to live is not to love...
awesome thriller that it is if once it captures us we yearn after it no matter the cost. methinks it the greatest of mysteries;-) fantastic work!
Love,
Eileen
Love,
Sage
I see the hurt and why does
love hurt? I'm thinking it's
the individuals misusing it.
or I hope so...
Hugs Dale
No one writes 'em like you do: hard hitting, in your face truths in painful lines. Only one who has been hurt can truly write/understand. And I do. (((HUGS))) You've made me cry--
(((HUGS))) and love, Karla. :(
(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in America, Karen Lynn in Texas. :D
Those ties can sometimes be too binding where escaping is only a hope but actually not an option. Fair or unfair the game can only be played with the resources which we are provided with. Blessings Always, Paul.
and it never ends...
Hugs Ch'erie
Be safe,
Karen
Big hugs
Fee
Blessings and Light and Love ...
Richard