I didn't write this. An African American English professor forwarded it to me. It would be funny if it wasn't so true .

Gul I loveded you,
Straight up fo'sho.
Or I wouldna told dem ova girls
not to call me no mo.

I knowed it was true ,
the first day I seed you.
Why you thank I do,
the thangs I do?

Remember how I use ta wine and dine you,
Schlits Malt Liquor and Bar-Ba-Que.
I gave you a bubble baze and fed you grapes.
Dey was on sale that week a dolla ninety-eight.

Romanic evenins after dark,

Skreet light walks around the block.
Like the very first time,
you came ova to my crib.
And you got all scared,
cause that roach was on yo Tims.
I was right dare,
with a can of spray.
To be yo Super Negro,
and save the day.

I ain't even pay my light bill,
so I can take you to da club.....
Don't knock ova dem candles
and burn up da rug!

And dat nite we made luv,
for a long liddle bit of time.
I hope you got yours,
cause I sho'nuff got mine.

I woke up early and made you breakfast in bed.
Sep fo I ain't have no juice, no grits, and no eggs.
Didn't have no cereals and was fresh outta milk,
so we had some toast and some potada chips.

I use to rub lotion on yo feets,
and massage yo back.
I found you some glue,
when you lost one of your tracks.

Now what man you knowed,
ever loveded you like dis.
Gul please just take my name
off dat child support list.