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Axilea MU

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Tense
by Axilea MU → (All Poetry by Axilea MU)
   Rated "PG13" by the Author.
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Tense


Lost feather
worthless treasure
he seeks
haunted
by the shadow on the wall
once again
fist ready for combat
against his own reluctance
against his fear
projected on the walls

He doesn’t see
there’s blood on the cold stone
he doesn’t see
the past is always absent
always

He holds his memory
in his fist
reclaiming his past
diluted
instant
after
instant
atomized
and through his hand
light turns yellow
he hears her swallow
in the room
he doesn’t see her
he doesn’t
the past is always absent
always
its rays
left through the cracks
of his mind (races)
a leak in his chest
while she keeps the treasure
in the palm of her heart
he’s just a second late
and the past is



Ties


He was taught
ink stains his hand
his heart is tied
(bloodred stone)
there’s something
… he forgot



Tight


She -
orgasmic tension
archetypal, unbent -
laws unwritten
dissolving
gasification
syncopated
a cough
then codeine
squeeze
tighter
holds
tense:
her present.


 

 

 


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 Reviews of "Tense"
Reviewed by Muhammad Al Mahdi
Reviewed on February 7, 2009
Epic in its dimension. A caleidoscope of visions, traits of reality connected by a thread that is not always tangible. Thought-provoking and inviting multiple reading.

Reviewed by 000 000 (Reader)
Reviewed on January 30, 2009
AWESOME! Your words

Reviewed by David Hightower
Reviewed on January 21, 2009
Axilea - I've read this several times and I get a sense of loss as in:

the past is always absent
always
its rays
left through the cracks
of his mind (races)
a leak in his chest
while she keeps the treasure
in the palm of her heart
he’s just a second late
and the past is

and

a cough
then codeine
squeeze
tighter
holds
tense:
her present.

Intriguing and thoughtful. - David

Reviewed by Cryssa C
Reviewed on January 21, 2009
Each so different...and yet connected. While I like the imagery of the first one best, I liked the rhythm of the second.

Cryssa

Reviewed by Dale Clark
Reviewed on January 19, 2009
This is an excellent piece...Love it!

Reviewed by jude forese
Reviewed on January 18, 2009
i like how your images pepper your motif ...

Reviewed by Alain Gracio
Reviewed on January 18, 2009
This is complete magic, magical indeed, Superb writing
Cheers
Alain

Reviewed by Christine Alwin
Reviewed on January 18, 2009
Superb words...brought me right into the core...excellent!
Christine

Reviewed by Elizabeth Price
Reviewed on January 17, 2009
Awesome. Liz

Reviewed by Felix Perry
Reviewed on January 17, 2009
Stunning write that captures the mind and won't let it go from start to finish.

fee

Reviewed by Ronald Hull
Reviewed on January 17, 2009
Tensley written.

Ron

Reviewed by Lois Christensen
Reviewed on January 17, 2009
3 great writes, encouragingly wonderful and needed to be read today by me.

Reviewed by Amber Moonstone
Reviewed on January 17, 2009
Very deeply moving, Axilea, I had to go back and re-read it, to fully take it all in. You have an amazing ability to draw the reader right into the heart of your verses.
Nicely written and beautifully executed, as always.
Peace, love, and light,
Amber "V"

Reviewed by Dawn Anderson
Reviewed on January 17, 2009
Often, when I've finished reading your work, I take a deep breath. Your mind works in a wondrous and beautiful way.

Reviewed by Liana Margiva
Reviewed on January 17, 2009
'While she keeps the treasure in the palm of her heart'--------I LOVE THIS!!!!!!!! IT IS BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!!! Liana Margiva

Reviewed by Charlie
Reviewed on January 17, 2009
These are excellent excercises in stream of concience. I love the image of the first fellow holding his memory in his fist-- really good stuff. --Charlie


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