God, it’s me, Dawn, forty and a freakin’ mess. I hope my period comes tomorrow and my heart will be alright and I will know it was only hormones, after all.
But the fact is, today, the day after Mother’s Day I can’t stop crying for what seems like no reason at all. All morning I’ve been out in the sun, painting things white, partly because it’s the only color I’ve got left, partly because maybe these old things made new will make me feel loved again. But I know they won’t.
I am luckier than most of the mothers you hold in the palm of your hand. But even when I wipe away my jealousy of sapphires and diamonds, green growing things and family outings, and forget the deflated balloon anonymous left in my yard (token thought or grand goodbye) even then –
I crumble inside and see there are no more pieces of me and no one here to love me back to life. But You… Are you there, God? It’s me, Dawn.
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Reviews of "Are You There?"
Reviewed by Vesna Perkovic (Reader)
Reviewed on May 17, 2005
I crumble inside and see
there are no more pieces of me
and no one here to love me back to life.
But You… Are you there, God?
It’s me, Dawn.
..aaaah ..dear friend there is ONE very special entitiy who simply adores you ( besides God)..indeed it is YOUR Twin Flame..think about it..talk to him when you take a few minutes to be silent..embrace him with your love..again you will marvel what may effuse from your heart, mind, soul.
blessings...
Feelings, like hormones and mood swings, are transient and yet are the powerful filter through which the whole of objective life is viewed. The fact (for us who believe) is that God IS there, closer than the shadow of our right hand. But sometimes His presence is veiled from our feelings until we can proclaim the fact of His presence, through faith, with confidence... like walking on water: what changed?! Only Peter's attitude! This is tough and I really feel this with you, Dawn. This speaks to me on the level of the pain of baby-loss, but also the "Why do you have to put me through this as if I walk alone?!"-thing. All I can say is that our subjectivity has to be worked through until our faith is strong enough to rise above it - then the "proof" comes: time and again that has been my personal experience, Dawn. You are NOT alone, irrespective of what your head is saying to your heart. I am convinced you will find HIS love to you today coming with arms open wide to you from a wholly unexpected source and when you are least expecting or looking for it. He doesn't play games with us... but He IS full of surprises! Sorry, didn't mean a preach out here. Lucid and gut-grippingly honest; a portrayal of where we all find ourselves at one time or another. If the shadows are in the valley, the Son and the Rock must be casting them; unfathomable and painful, perhaps, but a part of the journey to be undergone... LOL Kate xx
prayers can only be heard when we realize someone is listening ... on the other hand, to parphrase an interesting quote "sometimes when we pray we feel as though we are speaking to ourselves" ...
Always there, Dawn, just take a deep breath... This expressive piece is very touching indeed...
Many thanks for all you bring to Authorsden.
Best Wishes,
Carolyn
Powerful and stunning write, Dawn. Unfortunately redecorating won't change our lives, though it may cover the pain, sadness or emptiness for a brief time. This is a wonderful write, though it aches with a sense of futility.
Take care,
Sherry
Plaintive write. The last paragraph pulls at the heart. It's so hard to comprehend His love when we feel loveless, yet the irony is that this is when He loves us most!
Dawn,
The fact that you found grace to write this beautiful piece shows that God is there. He knows everything that goes on in the inside of you. He gave you strength to paint. And the color of white signifies peace. You have got peace, in spite of the tumoil inside.
Be assured that His love for you is genuine. Unfailing, unquantified!
Peace.
A Collection of Voices from Around the World is more than just a poetry compilation. It is a partnership of poets from around the globe brought together by an internet poetry forum. That forum, poetrypages.com, has been the home of many a fine poet s
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there are no more pieces of me
and no one here to love me back to life.
But You… Are you there, God?
It’s me, Dawn.
..aaaah ..dear friend there is ONE very special entitiy who simply adores you ( besides God)..indeed it is YOUR Twin Flame..think about it..talk to him when you take a few minutes to be silent..embrace him with your love..again you will marvel what may effuse from your heart, mind, soul.
blessings...
Vesna*
Peace, Carole
very potent poem!
Many thanks for all you bring to Authorsden.
Best Wishes,
Carolyn
Take care,
Sherry
You are getting poems of love as reviews.
Embrace the love, that's God.
John
And we thought only teens felt like this--o, the heartbreak and emotion in your words! (((((HUGS)))))
Well done--lean on Him, even when it seems He's far away...when you think He's not listening, be assured He is.
(((HUGS))) and love, Karla. :(
Good luck ...been there.....and now far beyond asking the same question AGAIN!!
Love Tinka
Superb write, for the topic, Dawn!
Love,
Eileen
The fact that you found grace to write this beautiful piece shows that God is there. He knows everything that goes on in the inside of you. He gave you strength to paint. And the color of white signifies peace. You have got peace, in spite of the tumoil inside.
Be assured that His love for you is genuine. Unfailing, unquantified!
Peace.
Emeka.