Sometimes I lie still,
mummified by a culture
which has no use for me,
petrified by breath of love
you have denied to me.

Sometimes I go forth,
forcing myself to believe
in second chance by chance,
wearing a straightjacket smile,
pretending I can dance.

Sometimes I hold back
or am held back by a past
which grabs me by the throat
and flings me down with such force
I’m in a dead man’s float.

Sometimes I press on,
determined to overcome,
pulled by future forward
from nothing into something
onward, upward, toward.

Today, soul gives way
and I meld into the muck
I’ve made of life, it’s made
of me. Dimmed by ticking
time sans you, I fade, fade.