A Father’s Nightmare

A father’s love is ill-defined
Not as demonstrative as mother’s lifeline
He leaves the house to places unknown
For what seems like an extended sojourn
He returns before nightfall, his briefcase in hand
Tired, but reluctant to reprimand

A father’s love can be illusive
Sometimes abusive, or intrusive
Emotions lacking when you want it most
Tall and quiet, nary a boast
He’s an engineer, coach, and confidante
Quick to advise, like a commandant

Never a tear, and shows no fear
A stalwart of strength and courage without peer
Lectures that transcend any common sense
To a teenager who to him seems dense
Rebellion is the order of the day
To establish identity apart from the fray

Older and wiser I now understand
What it means to be a father on demand
My children remind me how unyielding I am
I’m just like my father, I’ll be damned
More humble now, I take a backseat
And watch my kids grow, what a treat

I’m a grandfather now with a life to share
But no one listens, as if I’m not there
Today my children have families of their own
Disregard my advice with a sign or a moan
Relegated to counting the ticks on the clock
No longer master of my flock

I sit here now in a room full of strangers
Waiting for my next meal, like a babe in a manger
People crying and screaming around me
I pay no attention nor do I plea
The journey now brings me to this point
Of meaningless existence in this crazy joint