It will be a long day
that walks on me with heavy shoes
and crowds with elbow jabs on ribs
and urges me to blues.
Eternity will toss a blanket
wet with the weight of a distant tear
this anniversary of union
this dire quagmire of yesteryear ...
underneath is my original submission
the above is the corrected version...thank you everyone for your help I went with Jude ace's idea...love you all heaps...thanks so much.K.D.
It will be a long day
that walks on me with heavy shoes
and crowds with elbow jabs on ribs
and urges me to blues.
Eternity will toss a blanket
wet with weight from distant tears
this anniversary of a union
this quagmire dire of yesteryear's.
**************
footnote: To reader/poets...English advice needed on this poem please,as some of you know I was just past 14 years(1 week past it)when I left (flunked)school.I am unsure if it is correct to add the last 's' on yesteryear (last word) I prefer the word yesteryear but wanted to match it with the sound of 'tears'
so added the 's but am unsure really if that is correct in English terms...help please if you know the correct
English rules...should I drop the 's????
advice on this problem welcome,thanks heaps ,from Kay.
(me on my poetic walk----->
!!!!!)
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JOYCE * HIS INSPIRATIONS
Thank you for sharing
Love Tinka
Reindeer
(or do as Jude suggests;-) Can I walk with you;-)?
this anniversity of union
this dire quagmire of yesteryear ...
;)
I don't think you needed the apostophy before the s. Just "yesteryears" is fine.
This one is nicely-written. Thank you for posting.
May Lu a.k.a. Sandie May Angel :o)
And me thinks you don't need the apostrophe. Unless it was last year, yesteryears, me thinks can be a plural word, ending in 's.'
think poetic license......thats what i say.........but
i am the last one to give advise.......keep smiling.......pax..A