It's Me Again.  Are You There?

I wish I'd known you.
I always wanted a brother and
well, I ... I just wonder
what it would have been like,
um, Walter?

Strange.
I always thought of you as my, well, as
Michael.

I still think of you as Michael, you...
well, I suppose it doesn't matter,
but I,   you matter, so...


I don't even know why I am doing this!
Oh, I know it's not the first time,
I just feel so awkward this time
because I am not as certain.

Come on, talking to you as if you were here!
I mean you know how I am, but, Oh God, I
don't know...See? See!
I just assumed you know how I am and...
See!


Never Mind.
Just don't, well, don't let me believe
that you could be
if you aren't.

I want to believe,
I need to.
Now, all these years later.

I even wanted to find you somehow,
but, they don't really know exactly,
anymore where ...

Sorry.

It was such a long time ago and it would be too hard
for mom, dad, you know?

If I could get back there, though, I'd maybe look.

I don't, I can't see you,
not even that trace of you
and I miss you,
and I am so lost, Michael, I mean, Walter ...
I just... Damn, what difference does it make, now.

Michael.
Walter.
Whatever!

I just want to know if you Are?
And if you mind being my brother
and if you even know that I exist
and Is there a God and What is God
and Who and Why and ...

I've just always wondered if things
would have been different...
if you had really been around, a real brother,
my brother.

I'm so lost, see, and wondering again
if it would have made a difference ...
and here we are again, me talking to you
and me wanting you
to be listening.

me wanting Angels because
if Angels Are, then You Are
and I have my Real
brother.

I just wish I knew.
But I sometimes have to
believe, right Walter?

Walter?
Would you mind if I called you Michael?
I always thought that was supposed to be your name,
so...

thanks.