Troll Facts



Do trolls wear deerstalker hats?



Maybe when they visit Scotland to chase the deer - 'the venison tastes different from back home, a hint of heather and thistles.'



Are they related to Big Foot?


They may be cryptids like Big Foot, Sasquatch, and the Yeti. And they do live deep in the mountains like their distant cousins the goblins.



Can they speak?



They don't speak Finnish, but they're Swedish is good.



Do trolls eat frozen pizza?



They don't eat pizza at all, but love stone-ground and sour dough bread.



Are trolls violent ogres best avoided when in the forest or on the mountain?



Trolls, like us humans, can react aggressively if they feel threatened, 'Are you threatening me?'

but they are calmer than humans, and there's no bull-, reindeer, or moose shit, about them:



They like what they like!



Troll painters, Rolf Lidberg and Frank Bauer, are highly thought of in the troll community.





Finally, would you like to meet a troll one day?



Yes?



Go to Norway, or any other Scandinavian country! The Danish trolls are most out-going.



Sometimes, trolls hang out at Outdoor Sports Shops, Tourist Boards, and Souvenir stores,

accompanied by beautiful blonde Nordic women who have gained their trust.


Once, I saw a beautiful blonde with braids in a Scottish steam room sauna.

She sat next to a trollish-looking man with black hair.

'Hi, I'm Frida, and this is Angus.'


I might have been on the magic mushrooms at the time, though.