As it one day happened that I found myself in a querulous state of mind,
I decided it was time for me to go have a little chat with the Lady Upstairs.
She received me with a welcoming smile, faultlessly turned out as always
(which is not exactly surprising considering that She happens to be God)
said it was so nice of me to drop by and asked how She could be of help?

“Great Lady”, I said, “I know You’re busy running the Universe and
designing infinite dimensions and keeping Haley’s Comet on its course,
so I’m sorry to interrupt You, but I’ve been having some patience issues
with all these religious nuts and Bible-thumpers and holy rollers, Y’know,
and lately I can’t seem to quit wishing that You’d send ‘em a plague or ten.”

“I see,” She replied, with a knowing look from Her divinely azure eyes.
“Daughter, we’ve talked before, have we not, about the judgmental thing?
My wish is for you to accept and love all My children just the way they are.
It is not your place to determine their worthiness or wish harm upon them.
Have I not given you freedom of choice? Would you deny them theirs?”

“But Great Lady,” I protested, “THEY are the ones who won’t let ME alone!
Everywhere I go, I’m told that I’m a sinner. They say their way is the only way,
that the world is on its last legs and I’d better repent now if I want to be saved,
also they won’t stop praying for me, which irritates me nearly out of my mind
because I don’t want prayers, and worse yet they call You “the MAN upstairs”!

God laughed and She answered, “If that is their truth, Daughter, then so be it.
What matter to you if they see Me differently? As for their beliefs and prayers,
do not be so quick to condemn that which is well-intentioned from a good heart.
Have I not endowed you with my godly powers of forbearance and forgiveness?
I would that you not soil the gift of life with contentiousness and ill feelings.”

“You are right, Great Lady.” I humbly bowed my head. “I shall try to do better.
I’m sorry for taking up so much of your time, but I didn’t know where to turn.”
“Oh, but you did.” She smiled. “Go in peace, and if in dealings with your fellows
you will henceforth preserve a fair generous spirit, then I shall be greatly pleased.
Do not hesitate to come again. For you, Daughter, I've all the time in the world.”

LW