St. Paddy’s Day (Limericks with an Irish Flavour)

Limerick Limerick

Paddy said "Now here’s a trick,
I’ll set out on a trip from Limerick,
travel northwards to Lerwick,
returning via Berwick.
Now who said the Irish are thick?

 
No Benediction

Father Murphy was saying High Mass,
When a flea bit the priest on his ass,
"Oh feck," he exclaimed
(though recently ordained)
and forgot Benediction alas.

 
Leprechauns

Though Leprechauns are seldom seen
we all know their hair is bright green.
They eat Irish Stew,
Drink too much mountain dew
and their language becomes quite obscene.

 
The Black Stuff And Better
(The Black Stuff is Guinness stout of course)

There’s little an Irishman won’t do
for a pint of The Black Stuff or two
but on St. Paddy’s night
its their special delight
to sup poteen, a more potent brew.

 
The Lord of Bute

The Lord of the Island of Bute
thought excessive drinking a hoot,
he drank gallons of stout
(even though he had gout)
then threw up all over his suit.

Sex and the Sidhe
Caer Sidhe (pron. shee) is the overworld of Irish legend

The folk who dwell in Sidhe
are known for their bonhomie.
when they’ve had enough
of the rare owld stuff
They will bonk total strangers with glee.

(It’s said the Limerick for originated when someone declared it was impossible to rhyme the word Limerick)