A lesson, I hope, on how we judge people

straight,greetings,mall,wrinkled,make-upfamily,The Old Lady

I know what you see when you pass by me
Sometimes you even turn for a second look.
You see a lady walking slow and painfully
You see a lady who appears to be unkempt.

She is wearing out of style loose fitting clothing.
Oh my goodness, are those socks she is wearing?
No one wears socks these days and someone please tie her shoe.
Should I tie them for her? No, just let her go on
her way.

Her hair is thin, short, straight and gray.
Her family should take her to a beauty parlor.
Her face is wrinkled, tired and dried out.
A little make-up would add some life and color

And that heavy long coat; it must be too hot.
That hat looks like it belonged to her mother.
You shake your head and wonder as you turn to follow me.
Why do you follow me? You cannot say, but you do.

You think that I must have family, a child or husband.
You wonder how they can let me go dressed as I am.
You wonder why I am in a mall all by myself.
How did I get here? Did I walk or drive?

You notice how I nod my head as people talk to me.
You get closer behind me to hear what they say;
Amazed you are by the hello greetings I receive.
Some people even stop to talk a while.

In the store I hold tightly on to the carriage.
The item I want is way out of my reach.
You offer to get it for me.
My smile overwhelms you as I say “Thank You dear.”

I ask you if you think it is suitable for a six year old boy.
“You see”, I explain, “Tomorrow is my Grandson’s birthday”
As you look at the toy you tell me it is perfect, he will love it.
You are very much surprised when I ask “Why do you follow me?”

As you say you are sorry that you were just concerned
I grasp your hand and tell you not to be as I am fine.
I explain that I have a lot of medical problems
This is why I walk and dress the way I do.

My clothing is old fashioned I know, as is my coat and shoes.
But it is so easy to dress myself with my arthritic hands.
Because of the meds I am on, I am often cold so this coat is good for me.
Do you like my hat? It was my mother’s. I cannot bear to part.

When you get to my age it is nice to take a fashion break.
My closet is full of nice clothes and shoes.
I only wear them on special occasions.
I tell you the answers to the questions that are often asked of me.

But I must meet my daughter now at the coffee shop.
You are welcome to come with me and meet my family.
However, you must walk beside me and not behind me.
I would like to buy you coffee and you can wish Timmy Happy Birthday.”

I paid for the toy and we walked together hand in hand.
“Sara” my new friend said to me, “I learned a lesson today”
“One that I should have learned long ago”
“Never to judge people by their clothes, but only by their smiles”


Tina Millner
Oct. 2, 2006