Join Free! | Login    
   Popular! Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry
Where Authors and Readers come together!


Featured Authors:  John McCoy, iBrad Kennedy, iMark Seltman, iRichard Mason, iSky Purington, iJ. Joy Matthews Alford - Sistah Joy, iChynna Laird, i

  Home > Psychology > Articles Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry     

Candida L Eittreim

· + Follow Me
· Contact Me
· Books
· Articles
· Poetry
· News
· Blog
· 166 Titles
· 643 Reviews
· Save to My Library
· Share with Friends!
Member Since: Mar, 2001


Subscribe to the Candida L Eittreim Newsletter. Enter your name and email below and click "sign me up!"
Candida L Eittreim, click here to update your pages on AuthorsDen.

Autumn: Looking Inside Ourselves
by Candida L Eittreim   
Not "rated" by the Author.
Last edited: Tuesday, September 07, 2004
Posted: Tuesday, September 07, 2004

  Print   Save    Follow    Share 

Recent articles by
Candida L Eittreim

The Dark Night Of The Soul: A Pilgrim's Journey
The Middle East: Making False Assumptions
Abuse: Judging The Victims
Iran's President: A Terrorist Unmasked
Methamphetamines: Part Two: Crystal Meth
Methamphetamines: Part One
The Hypersexualisation Of America
           >> View all

Make this coming holiday season a celebration of your personal growth and renewed commitment to living with honesty and love.

Summer is over, the cooler weather, and the holidays that follow, are almost here. Every year, we promise ourselves, post holiday,  that we will do things differently, or more efficiently, next time. This has been a very stressful time for so many of us, with our women and men dying for us overseas, unemployment, illnesses and more.


                 Autumn has always been a reflective time of year, a de-stressing from busy summer planting and activities. It is a perfect time to close unfinished business, make amends and strengthen your relationships. Think of it this way. Wouldn’t it be great if you could finally have a holiday, free from angst and past garbage?


                  Start by writing down events of the past year, using two columns: positive/ negative. Think about the issues that trouble you most in your relationships with others. How much of the trouble is your responsibility? What can you do to change it for the better? Have you intentionally hurt someone you love? Look at your family closely. What can be done to build a tighter, stronger family unit? It isn’t easy taking a good deep look inside yourself. It’s extremely uncomfortable and often pretty revealing.


                   This exercise requires strict self- honest introspection on your part. It means taking total responsibility for your actions, without excuse or rationalization. This isn’t  meant to be done in a day or two, but over a period of weeks. Especially for someone who has never cleaned house before. 



                This is an excellent time for couples to renew and change their relationships for the better.Ask your mate to give you a wish list of things he/she would most like to see happen between you. What needs changing? You can swap your letters and then set aside time privately to discuss things. Both of you need to agree to not use this as a weapon to hurt one another, and to take any criticisms offered as well meant. If you have hurt each other, this exercise can be prefaced by a note of apology for whatever caused the problem, taking full responsibility.  It is very important to personal growth to accept that you may not get the response you’d hoped for. The point of doing this, isn’t about the response, but your becoming mature enough to say I did it, I’m sorry. On your part, you perhaps would take a long look at the why’s of your behaving in certain ways. If you need help, get some counseling or discuss it with a trusted friend.


                  Children benefit enormously from this type of communication. With the overbooked lives so many of us lead, our children’s needs and issues tend to get overlooked or minimized. Ask your children to participate in some honest family soul searching. Ask them how you’re doing as a parent. What bothers them the most? What can you do to change that? You can negotiate a brand new family interaction, given a willingness on everyone’s part to work at it. What a great time to start some goal setting and character building ideals into your family unit.


                   Ask your child which goals in school, sports/activity, and personal growth they’d like to set. Once they’ve identified them, create a chart, where they can visibly be reminded and track their progress. To complement their work, you can set your own goals and they can then interact with you in meeting these goals. This encourages cooperation and communication between you. If your child has been given too many things without earning them, it’s time for change. Let them know from now on anything they receive will be earned in a variety of ways. That includes some show of selflessness. Community work, cooperation, acts of kindness and doing things out of love. What a concept!



                     Our parents are often a source of deeply hidden angst and resentment. If you have an extremely troubled relationship with your parents or siblings, try and work on reaching some level of comfort. If the issues are deeply entrenched, or involve abuse or deception, this will require great courage on your part. Again, this is about closure for you, and anything else positive that may come out of it is only a bonus. Realize that someone who has hurt you badly, may not be able to own their actions. You however, can own yours. The greatest gift you can give yourself and others is forgiveness. Once you can strip away the layers of selfish pain, and see the person as human and very flawed, forgiveness becomes easier. And with that act of letting go of anger and hurt, comes freedom. You have unshackled yourself from the chains that have held you for so long.


                       Make this coming holiday season a celebration of your personal growth and renewed commitment to living with honesty and love. If it’s too difficult to deal with the way things still are with others, change your holiday plans. Do something fresh and new to reflect the differences inside you. Change is often a frightening concept. I promise you, if you put some time and sincere effort into your inner world, you will come away feeling years younger and much more serene. Give yourself the gift of love, and make the changes needed to help you grow into the beautiful human being God meant you to be.

Web Site: Scribblers

Reader Reviews for "Autumn: Looking Inside Ourselves "

Want to review or comment on this article?
Click here to login!

Need a FREE Reader Membership?
Click here for your Membership!

Reviewed by Neo bane (Reader) 9/7/2004
this is the best article i have ever read
Popular Psychology Articles
  1. Daniel Craig Mocked, But Could Have Answer
  2. Little Laws 4 Big Success
  3. What Was I Thinking?
  4. Elements of Critical Thinking
  5. Profiling Trayvon Martin
  6. Common Sense is Over-rated
  7. Keeping In Touch
  8. 1400 WNEX
  9. Fear and Love and Doom
  10. Jung, Alchemy and Active Imagination

Diary of a Narcissist by Sam Vaknin

The anatomy of a mental illness - its origins, its unfolding, its outcomes. ..  
BookAds by Silver, Gold and Platinum Members

Along Came A Spider: A Personal Look At Madness by Maryanne Raphael

Along Came A Spider, A Personal Look at Madness is the true story of a woman's descent into insanity and her successful struggle to reach sanity. Based on intimate diaries thi..  
BookAds by Silver, Gold and Platinum Members

Authors alphabetically: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Featured Authors | New to AuthorsDen? | Add AuthorsDen to your Site
Share AD with your friends | Need Help? | About us

Problem with this page?   Report it to AuthorsDen
© AuthorsDen, Inc. All rights reserved.