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  Home > Humor > Articles Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry      Authors: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z     

By George xx xx

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The Orangutan
by By George xx xx   
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Hinkly Dinkly Reporting

ST. LOUIS - One of the Saint Louis Zoo's most popular orangutans, and its oldest primate, has died. Zoo officials said "Junior" was euthanized after his health had been declining. He was thought to be about 44 years old.
He was born in Sumatra, a western Indonesian island, and came to the U.S. in 1963.

Am I the only one who finds that outrageous?

Can you believe that?

An ORANGUTAN gets National Front Page coverage? Is this the Planet of the Apes?

Sure I feel for him, but for one thing he was only 44.
Ya call that old?
I’m older than that already and I’ll be lucky to get a line in the way back section of the obits.

He wasn’t even an American. He was born in Sumatra. I’ll bet he didn’t have a green card, let alone a job. I’ve probably been supporting him for the last 40 years.

Are we running out of news that they have to print such a story? I don’t want to sound callous but when a monkey gets a bigger write up than me I’m going to get my two cents in.

And what’s with this euthanized? When you kill a chicken you cut off it’s head and eat it…
but an orangutan gets euthanized.

I’ll bet he gets buried in a bigger grave than mine too?

Hold the cheers,
Hinkly Out!
By George


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