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Tom Hyland

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Books by Tom Hyland
5 T - B 2 - P 2
By Tom Hyland
Last edited: Tuesday, March 03, 2009
Posted: Tuesday, February 24, 2009



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Recent articles by
Tom Hyland

• LUCK ?
• TRANSPORTATION
• POLITICS ?
• GOOD PEOPLE vs. ARROGANT S.O.B's
• CONJUGATION OF VERBS
• RENT
• Fun With Some CON Words
           >> View all 378
The title sounds like a Relative of the Androids - R2D2 and C3P0 doesn't it?

No such Luck! Just got tired of typing that other long title - Tom's Tall Tales Told Truthfully ... SO - forthwith 5 T shall have to suffice!

B 2 = Book 2 - and P 2 = Part 2 - got the Picture?

It's almost like writing Secret Coded messages, OK?

So, go get your Tom Mix or Flash Gordon Secret Decoder Ring, and let's get started -







5 T - B 2 - P 2
aka - T T T T T -
© - Tom Hyland - 02-24-09


RE: ED KOSTRO’S - SPAY/NEUTER DAY -

Only Review before mine -

Reviewed by Ed Matlack
2/24/2009

When I was very young, they were going to put me down because I was not too friendly, or at least thats what they told me...but the Ocean City Humane Society took me in and they are a no kill shelter & I waited a whole year for daddy & mommy to come find me & then the humane society paid half to have me "fixed"...I STILL to this day don't understand what of me was broken to have it fixed...;-) Rufuz


MR. ED - thank you for such clear and informative 'poop' about pets.

As I was reading, I could not help but think about the J.D. DILEMMA - then, as I scrolled down to the bottom, sure enough there he was - stating that '...they were going to put me down...'

But, to my dismay, I then realized it was really a post by his Alter-Ego RUFUZ! BUMMER!

Anyway, I would like to nominate YOU - PEE-WEE - to be the President of the Chicago Chapter of The LET'S SPAY MATLACK Society!

This action would be in the interest of all concerned - let me Count the Ways:

1. Apparently, NEUTERING him did NOT work - even tho' your MA & Pa paid good money to a transient part-time vetinarian, who was a part-time Medic in Nam and therefore a Double VET! Accordingly, J.D. was recently proposing to SELL HIS BODY ON THE STREETS OF DOWNTOWN SEA ISLE CITY - many citizens found that thought to be quite REPULSIVE!

2. ERGO, it would seem that the only HUMANE alternative would be to have him SPAYED - this necessary procedure might serve a dual purpose - the Elimination of his short-term "MONTHLIES" - which result in his BITCHING & MOANING - as well as the possible avoidance of his long-term PMS! Trust me, this should be avoided at ALL COSTS!

3. To That End - and as President, you should establish a FIX MATLACK FUND - set up a PAYPAL ACCOUNT - and within MINUTES, Millions of readers, all across the World can each Donate ONE PARTIALLY COPPER PENNY EACH - let's see now - 1,000,000 X 1c = $10,000 !

WOW - in the blink of an eye - ONE FELL SWOOP - or is it SWELL FOOP? -

TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS - HELL, we could then do a complete MAKE-OVER -
Haircut - Manicure - New Wardrobe - Food for his Pantry - Gas in the old RV - New Tires - a NEW PROPANE HEATER - and he could then drive out to your polished POLISH MANSION in the WOODS - and you two BROS could live HAPPILY EVER AFTER !

In the immortal words of George Peppard, of THE A TEAM -
"I LOVE IT WHEN A PLAN COMES TOGETHER!"

HAPPY: - SPAY-DAY - POONCH-KEY DAY - FAT TUESDAY - MARDI GRAS - ALMOST ASH WEDNESDAY -

47 DAYS TIL THE EASTER BUNNY LAYS EGGS!

OOPS!
TWO GUYS IN WHITE COATS ARE BANGING ON MY DOOR -
GOTTA RUN NOW & HIDE UNDER THE BED ...

TOMKAT ...

==================================================


f

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Reviewed by J'nia Fowler 2/24/2009
Your humor just kills me Tom. Excellent to the n'th degree. hugs, J'nia
Reviewed by John Martin 2/24/2009
Nice write, Tom. Here’s something interesting…. Shades of Jean Shepherd... I ran that through my Little Orphan Annie secret message decoder ring and it came out.. "Don’t Forget to Drink your Ovaltine!”
Reviewed by Mr. Ed 2/24/2009
Thank God I still wear my Dick Tracy Decoder Watch - I figured out your title right away - and my wife thinks I should throw it out!

As for Spay Matlack Day, I'll contact Ma and see what she thinks!

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