Winnie’s Walk

© - Bernie Wengert - 04-01-09

The time between peace and desperation can be measured in hours, minutes, or even seconds!

I walk Winnie, gaze up at the sky, and listen to birds - as the world awakens. Even the birds have moments of strife - like the big crow chasing the little sparrows from a food source. However, the sparrows just fly away - they don’t fight, demand food, or seem to mind at all - it is the nature of life. No emotions, just an immediate change in direction - and the sparrows seek food elsewhere. Whom is more peaceful? More powerful?

I watch people as Winnie and I walk. There are particular types of people. Most frequent are the young males. In my neighborhood, most of them happen to be black, and most are terrified of Winnie. They actually change directions, in order to avoid us! Fear is easily seen in their eyes.

The smaller, younger kids calm down when I speak and tell them that she is wagging her tail to say Hello. The young adult males however, can not let go of their fear, and I often need to hold Winnie, so they can pass by.

My favorites are the older generation. Yesterday, an elderly gentleman was walking towards us on the sidewalk. Winnie was oblivious, and just sniffing dirt. When she saw the gentleman, I was preparing to hold her in place. When the man’s eyes met mine, he smiled and laughed. So Winnie looked up, then went right back to her sniffing. She obviously was enjoying a newfound scent much more than the man’s presence.

So why does she bark at those with fear, and ignore those who are calm and happy? Does the difference lie in attitude? Can she sense the difference? Smell it? Did this gentleman like dogs? Is he therefore so aware that he instinctively knows that the dog only reacts to fear - so he purposefully does not show any fear? Can people control all presence of fear? If so, how?

As I sit and write, I think of my life. How often have people abused me? Too many - too often - to even count! Am I like those young men who show fear? Do I set myself up for the abuser to just crush me? I believe I do.

I believe the bullies in the world have very little ‘soul-enlightening’ traits, but they are very keen at sniffing out fear. So, when a bully meets someone with poor self-confidence, poor self-esteem, fear of failing - whatever - the bully, like Winnie, will bark!

Winnie is only twenty-seven pounds, and a cute little miniature Shelty - but she can terrify a six-foot male! A bully can be, and often is, a small presence also, but well tuned into sensing another’s fears. Like a dog, the bully barks, and strikes fear in the hearts of anyone lacking self-confidence, self-esteem, or self-power.

Dogs are usually peaceful, fun-loving, and a loving part of any family - literally, man’s Best Friend! However, errors in upbringing or teaching can create a dog who recognizes his/her power to use it to bully people.

We hear of stories of dogs attacking, often unexpectedly, and causing terrible pain to the unsuspecting recipient of this oppression. Terms are often used and accepted by ‘dog people’ as Type A personalities, versus Type B ones.

Years ago, when our family dog Rusty, attacked my daughter and myself, I was told by a breeder that - IT WAS OUR FAULT! Simply because we were not Type A ‘strong’ personalities. My husband (ex now) was definitely Type A - he was totally in charge of disciplining our dog. This adorable puppy was taught and trained to only respond to a stern and aggressive owner. The puppy then learned to use that power against others - even his own loving family. Although Rusty was adorable to behold, he ultimately had to be destroyed, after multiple vicious attacks!

People become bullies for multiple reasons. I leave that to Psychologists, and Psychiatrists. This bully, or abusive personality type, seems to be always alert to all Type B personalities who enter his/her environment. Like Winnie, who chooses to bark at the fearful passers-by, the bully likes to torment, or exert power over the ‘weaker’ beings.

The bully’s size is large - only in his/her own mind! It is a sense of power - control - perhaps even wrath or anger, once exerted upon him/her?

These types of people, often referred to as ‘control freaks’ can be even worse, when some hierarchy actually puts them in charge of others. This is evidenced in families - like a parent over a child, an older sibling who ‘baby-sits,’ or a dominating aunt or uncle even. In the workplace, it is often the leader, the boss, or any other management ‘authority’ who even thinks he/she is in charge!

Wherever such power, or authority is endorsed, or understood, or even condoned - especially in organizations, like: politicians, police, military, or even religious groups - somewhere, at some level, you will find Bullies!

Oops! Time for “Winnie’s Walk” - will there be A’s or B’s - or Both?


© - BMW