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Tom poesyco.th@gmail.com

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WE STINK !
by Tom poesyco.th@gmail.com   
Rated "R" by the Author.
     
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CAUTION: This article is in no way Pretty!

It may be Honest, Forthright, and maybe even a tad Accurate ... but not for the 'Faint of Heart'!

Peruse at your own RISK!


OH ... the Pic caption, in case you can't read the small print, says:

"DAMN RIGHT I'M GONNA SNIFF IT ...
IT'S WHAT I DO ...


We STINK !


© - Tom Hyland - 2/26/13


I think it was somewhere in Mark that Jesus said:
“It is what comes out of a man that makes him ‘unclean’.”

So, just How do We Stink?
Let me Count the Ways...

1. Number One is when we Do a Number Two! UGH !
Ever walk into a Restroom After someone just ‘Took a Dump’?
“Who DIED in Here?”

2. How about Sweaty Armpits? Stinko!
Especially if you ate Garlic earlier ...

3. After Workouts - Sweaty Crotches!
Over-Worked Sweat Glands ... Egad!

4. What about ‘Body Odor’?
Some individuals Really REEK, don’t they?

5. Then, there’s HALITOSIS ...
I once had a Boss whose Breath Always Smelled like...
He Just Ate somebody’s Number TWO!
GADZOOKS!

6. Next, what about ‘Eye Boogers’?
Ever smell those little Dudes? YUCK!

7. What is that Stuff that comes out of ‘White-heads’ when Popped?
PUS ... ‘the yellowish or greenish fluid that forms at sites of infection,
Consisting of dead white blood cells, dead tissue,
Bacteria, and blood serum’ ...
Isn’t that description really Appetizing?
Double UGH!

8. Have you ever considered ‘Toe Cheese’?
DISGUSTING is pretty descriptive, isn’t it?

CAUTION:

If you are Squeamish ... do NOT Read the Following!

9. Women’s ‘Yeast Infections’ are certainly No Picnic, Right?
I wouldn’t know, just a ‘Wild Guess’!

10. DEAD ‘Little Men’ ... SPERMIES!
OMG ... REPULSIVE ... to say the Least!


Like I Said:

WE STINK !!!


And ... What can we DO about it?

1. Bathroom DEODORIZER!
2. Underarm DEODORANT!
3. Take a SHOWER!
4. Take MORE SHOWERS! MORE FREQUENTLY!
5. GARGLE with MOUTHWASH ... A LOT!
FLOSS! TOOTHPASTE!

6. WASH YER FACE!
7. DON’T ‘POP’ ‘EM!
8. WASH YER FEET!
9. DON’T GET COLPITIS!
10. BURY THOSE LIL SUCKERS SOONER!


© - TKH...... OOPS!

An Observant reader pointed out that I MISSED
an important reason that WE STINK ...

11. GAS ... FARTS! Remedy? BEENO 1st !


  


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Reviewed by Chip Bergeron
Reviewed on February 26, 2013
Hmmmm....Thomas, Thomas, Thomas......so true. Almost borders on too much information....We humans are a cornucopia of vile odors that other beasts with more developed sniffers find either interesting or horrifying....

ChipB

Reviewed by S. Tucker
Reviewed on February 26, 2013
Wow. Of all the things I might have expected of you, a 'cleanliness is next to Godliness' rant would have been close to the bottom of the list. We can't stop 'excreting' without dying. The machinery MUST keep on running, using up the fuel we put in and getting rid of the nasty by-products. It's imperative. And you left out gas. Showering isn't going to help THAT at all. I could go on a matching rant here but I won't. I'm too busy scratching my head (did you forget that horrific dirty hair smell) wondering what set you off on this one. Actually I'm shivering here remembering a guy who worked in the same office I did who had all these and a couple you haven't mentioned and I WON'T. Trust me, UGH just won't begin to cover THAT guy. Still scratching, I remain, your confused friend.

Sand

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