If you want to be effective in this world, you've got to learn to interact with others. No matter what you want, getting others involved is crucial. Whether you're going door to door selling vacuum cleaners, or trying to get exposure online, how you deal with others will have a profound impact on how successful you'll be.
Sure, if you've got a great idea, and you get it out there, it will eventually get heard on its own merit. But often times, this won't happen until long after you're gone. Take Van Gogh for example. A brilliant painter. Perhaps one of the best of all time.
How many paintings did he sell during his lifetime? Only one. And even that was to a buddy of his.
Now, I don't know about you, but I want to be successful in this lifetime, not hundreds of years after I'm dead!
So how do you interact with others effectively? What are the best
interpersonal skills to develop that will help you get your message across?
The most important one is to be able to translate your message, whatever it may be, in a way that will be understood by whomever you're speaking with.
You do that by first understanding their needs and wants. Then you figure out how they represent the world. Then you speak in "their language" and show them that by accepting your message (whether it's buying your product or agreeing with your choice of restaurant) they will get their needs met.
Because here's the bottom line. Most of us don't care about anybody but ourselves. To the extent we are willing to go the extra mile to help others, we are expecting, on some level, to be helped out ourselves.
Dale Carnegie famously said that everybody is always listening to their favorite radio station: WII-FM, or What's In It For Me.
Often times this works on an unconscious level. But if you ignore this, you won't get very far. Sure it may seem horrible to think we live in a terrible world where we're surrounded by self centered maniacs, but consider this.
What would happen if you simply assumed this was true ? What would happen if you first thought about their wants before delivering your message? If it were true that everybody was a selfish bastard, this strategy would work.
And if it wasn't true that everybody was a selfish bastard, it would work even better. No matter what you want, you can get it, so long as you help others get what they want first.
To learn more powerfully effective communication strategies and techniques, and how to skyrocket your people skills, take a look at
Mind Persuasion today.
