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Ian R Thorpe
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Books
• The Best Of Boggart Blog (vol 1)

• Dimensions of Mystery

• A Two Faced Poet

• Millennium Dawn (anthology)

• A Stroke of Luck


Short Stories
• Psycho Benefit Fraud

• The Vegetarian Shoemaker Of Barking

• Garry Trotter and the Portal of Pleasure #7

• Garry Trotter and the Portal of Pleasure #3 (Adult Humour)

• The King of the Ribble Delta Blues Singers (humour)

• A Stroke of Luck - Chapter 19

• A Stroke of Luck - Chapter 18

• A Stroke of Luck - Chapter 17

• A Stroke of Luck - Chapter 16

• A Stroke of Luck - Chapter 15


Articles
• Shocking Revelation: michael Jackson and barack Obama The Same Person

• A Career In Substance Abuse? Sounds Just The Job For Me.

• G20: World Leaders Kick Off A Witch Hunt

• Girls Alone (News From The Girls School

• Italian Vampire's Grave Discovered

• Stone Throwing Chimp Shocks Scientists

• Women In Labout (not pregnancy but political satire)

• V2G: Technology You Can't Believe In.

• Scientists Have Doubts About Doomsday Machine

• The flame still Burns Tribute to Robert Burns)


Poetry
• Doctor, Doctor

• Jack (a horrible Halloween poem)

• Tribute To A Prodigious Liver (Keith Floyd)

• Kiss and Sell

• Where Did All The Money Go

• Ode to Politicians

• The New Poet Laureate

• From The Darkness : Vernal Equinox

• Danny Boyle: A Song For Oscar

• Graduation Blues

         More poetry...
News
• Poetry Life and Times Interviews Janet Caldwell

• Ian Thorpe on Christian Radio. Unbelieveable

• Season's Greetings

• July Poetry Life and Times

• Poetry Life and Times

• Ian's Audio online at last (specially for halloween)

• Multi - Media and poetry - the future

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Recent poems by Ian R Thorpe
Pooh Sticks
The Dinner Plates of Old England (humour)
Afghan Woman
Western Monkeys (political protest)
The Offcomer
Who Stole The Stars
Doctor, Doctor
Tommy Clod
Peccavimus
Feel The Burn
Pastor Penney
THEM (poem noir)
           >> View all 151
You Just Can't Be Too Paranoid
by Ian R Thorpe
Sunday, March 21, 2004
Not rated by the Author.

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Another golden oldie. Just for fun and because I love conspiracy theories. For non - UK readers, Lord Lucan was (is?)
an English aristocrat who disappeared after allegedly murdering his children's nanny. Some say
he committed scuicide, others insist he is still alive and sightings are reported in the tabloid
press occasionally. Menwith Hill is a US Government satellite monitoring station sited in the
north of England and The Inland Revenue the UK Taxation agency.


Earth is controlled by aliens
The information is surpressed
By covert government agencies
In both the East and West
George Dubya is a Martian
So are Chirac and Blair too
I read it in the tabloid press
So I know it must be true
Elvis is alive and well
His hairline now recedes
I saw him chatting with Lord Lucan
In a small cafe near Leeds.
The spy station at Menwith Hill
Records each phone-call that you make
The Inland Revenue without telling you
Have authority to take
The cash out of your Bank account
If you make some small mistake
On your annual tax return
All your friends and neighbours
Can find out how much you earn.
Your bank and your employer
Collaborate with MI5
They have a secret dossier
On everyone alive
The illuminati have their agents
in every town and street.
Mysterious societies
Control army and police
You have no individual liberty
In anything you do
You just can't be too paranoid
Big Brother is watching you....

 

Another look at social paranoia in Fear and Panic and H.P. Sauce at Boggart Blog.

 

 

 

 


Boggart Blog Everything Is bad For You


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Reviewed by Lois Christensen 6/4/2008
Good write and oh so true of life and being watched. Camera's hidden everywhere, and the most unusual places too. We are never free from the world's eyes.
Reviewed by Nordette Adams 8/15/2004
This uh Lord Lucan fella, so he really know Elvis, huh? If I wuz you, man, I wouldn't be writin' on the Net 'bout dem Illuminatis. They's some mean mothers and they's everywhere you know. My grandmother's unlce's cousin's fiancee's stepson told me all about 'em. I gots the skinny. ;-)

I barely made it through this, Ian, I was laughing so hard. Have you heard BareNaked Ladies song "Everybody Get in Line?" If not, I'll send you a link.
Reviewed by jude forese 3/21/2004
clever write!
Reviewed by Anna Marie Fritz 3/21/2004
Gottcha!
You said a mouthful of wisdom here!!!
Reviewed by Gaye Dale (Reader) 3/21/2004
LOLOL!!!
Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 3/21/2004
This is so true...no matter what...the Guy Up There Is Watching Too!!

Love Tinka
Reviewed by Lisa Hilbers 3/21/2004
Everywhere you go Ian! Everywhere! This is really an enjoyable read! Lisa


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