Fall is a special time of year,

When in oak forest you reside,

Animals hustle and bustle here,

Picking acorns from hillside.

Deer love whiteoak acorns dearly,

As do squirrels, turkeys and jays.

Woodpecker calls, not clearly,

Full mouth muffles what he says.

He’s forgotten that in the spring,

He found the side mirrors on my truck.

Busted them both, doing his thing,

I didn’t cover them — my bad luck!

And mice — under leaves they scurry,

Carrying acorns to their dens —

Unless in their careless hurry,

They find bears, gobblers or hens.

The little devils cost us a mint,

In auto air conditioners nesting.

At in-home damage I’ll hint,

My patience they’re sorely testing.      

Bears make the most of acorn fat,

Frantically stuffing and chomping,

Some hulls fall, but most not spat,

Roughage keeps innards romping.

Wild animals are daily in the yard,

We see buck, doe and fawn.

Raising a flower garden is hard,

To candy patch deer are drawn. 

Still, it’s a surprise on home arrival,

Intentions for regular parking space,

To find mama and two cubs as rival —

Horn barely quickens their pace.

Cubs look so soft, so cuddly and cute,

You’d like to tussle with them and play,

But there’s mama — she’s a no-no brute,

If you should try, she’d ruin your day.       

Into the woods they eventually retreat,

Far enough that we gain the door.  

To the windows in haste we beat,

Watch obsidian glide on forest floor.

They circle house to the southern trees,

Eat contentedly ‘til darkness’ blend.

We watch them rolling in culinary seas,

Then turn to other things humans tend.

But sometime during black of night,

Black furry bellies fill to the brim,

Black furry brains turn on a light:

“Tear rude noise-maker limb from limb!”    

On their way they found a long snake,

And even though it was three-ply,

Many squirts along it did make,

Made my garden hose bleed and die.

Went on to where the new car was parked,

Reared up on her to rake and thump her,

Left dirty paw prints all over her marked,

Mama’s high up and babies’ on her bumper.

The back window wiper was what mama found,

So her teeth had something in which to sink.

And the arm broke off and fell to the ground,

Neat as a pin, quick as a wink!

Acorns are still falling, bears need the fat,

So this year’s crop for them is a boon.

We hope for no more mischief like that,

And they all go to den one day soon.

Critters sometimes with the devil align —

Try to push you to town and farther.

But living in the oaks is still fine —

I’d far rather do that than the other.

© 2006 R. Leland Waldrip