At first there was disbelief
numbness instead of grief
The loss was hard to take in
unreal, surreal, out of feel.

Then realisation struck,
quickly, stealthy it snuck in
Like a ninja sneaking past
my protective wards,
killed me without swords.

Tears came, trickle by trickle,
my mind snapped ever so 
often back to numb,
refused to see what
threatened to be
the death of me.

Days, weeks passed going
back and forth, time
became something
of an enemy, that I
could not grasp,
to quick to catch.

Then suddenly into the blue
the floodgates released,
tears abundant, 
grief sharp and bitter,
digging holes in me.

New scars formed
out of tormented
soul, sorrow
eating me whole.

There is no getting you back.