This is an anti-suicide song that starts out sounding like a pro-suicide song.
(I have removed some of my poems about suicide.)


The heart asks pleasure first,
And then, excuse from pain;
And then, those little anodynes
That deaden suffering,

And then, to go to sleep;
And then, if it should be
The will of its Inquisitor,
The liberty to die.

Emily Dickinson


The Heart Asks Pleasure First

In this poem, it is the heart (the id) that asks
but it's the mind (the ego) that negotiates a way to satisfy it.

The first request comes from Eros (Kāma-taṇhā)
but all of the rest come from Thanatos (Vibhava-taṇhā).
For it is Eros that seeks pleasure and Thanatos that seeks to avoid pain.

The whole thing is kind of like Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs in reverse
though it's about desires rather than needs. (difficult to distinguish)
As we progress through the poem, the heart settles for less and less.
(This regression is somewhat similar to my own “Eros and Lethe”.)

If I can't have pleasure, then may I at least have release from pain?
If I can't have that, then may I have pain killers? (The Waters of Lethe)
If I can't have those, then may I just go to sleep? (Oblivion)
And finally, if there is no other way to escape my suffering,
may I be permitted to die?
(When I sleep without dreams, I'll no longer pine for Eden.)

To be or not to be. It is still the question.
IT IS ALWAYS THE QUESTION.