Who knows the Symbol
for the Element - Lead?
Raise your Hands!
Very Good! It is Pb.
Huh? Why Pb?
Because the Correct Latin Name
For Lead is Plumbium!
Say the word Out Loud - Plumbium!
Sounds Funny - Doesn’t It?
When is a Plum Not Aplomb?
When it is Laying on its Side -
Ergo - a Dumb Plum that is Not Plumb!
Egads - is the Man Plumb Mad?
Just a Meager Attempt at Humor -
A ‘Play’ on Words - Not Unlike -
“When is a Door Not a Door?”
“When it’s Ajar!”
Ajar means Open ...
Oft-times when a Door is Ajar -
There is a Reason!
Because it was Not Hung Properly!
It is Not Plumb!
A Good Carpenter Always Plumbs a Door.
In Days of Old - He used a Plumb-Bob.
This is a Simple Tool -
A Heavy Pointed Conical Weight -
Suspended on a String -
Usually, a Long String - Called a Plumb-Line!
For Many Years Now -
The ‘Level’ has Replaced the Plumb-Bob.
An Elongated Rectangular Tool with ‘Bubbles.’
When ‘Right on the Bubble’ - it is Plumb!
A Plum-Bob only Functions Vertically.
Whereas a Level works Horizontally Also!
Whenever Any Structure is Built -
It Must be Plumb!
So - When is a Carpenter -
Not a Carpenter?
When he is a Plumber!
And - Just What is a Plumber?
He is a ‘Pipe’ Man -
A Master Mechanic of Pipes.
No - Virginia - Not the Smoking Kind!
The Metal Kind - Made from Lead!
In the ‘Olden Days’ these Lead Pipes -
Or Rather, Plumbium Pipes -
Were Coated either as Black -
Or Shiny Silver - Galvanized!
For Probably a Century or More -
Every Water Supply Pipe in Every Building
Was Made of Lead!
Every Hear of ‘Lead Poisoning’?
No - Gertrude - the ‘Guv’mint’
Would have us Believe That -
Kids were Eating the Lead-Based Paint
Off The Walls!
Meanwhile, We Were All Ingesting Lead -
Every Day from our ‘Drinking Water’!
Someone, Sometime, said:
“Eureka! Lets Use Copper Pipes!”
Copper Does Not Contain Lead!
However, after Decades of Doing Thus -
Someone, Somewhere, Realized That -
Each and Every ‘Sweated’ Joint of Copper ...
Was Joined by ‘Solder’ -
A Compound of Guess What? LEAD!
Still a ‘Present Danger’ ...
Lesser, No Less, but Still Un-Healthy!
So - Someone, Somewhere ...
Invented ‘Un-leaded Solder’ -
A New - Improved ‘Safety Code’
Voila!
More Time Passed - Plastic Pipe
Called ‘PVC’ then Replaced Copper -
For Both Water Supply Lines -
As Well as Drainage Lines.
Meanwhile - ‘Back at The Ranch’ -
Millions of Older Homes -
Still had That ‘NASTY’ Stuff!
Retro-Fitting Became the ‘Catch-Word’!
Practically, a New Industry -
Billions of Dollars Spent -
Besides the Plumbers Plumbing New Houses -
More Plumbers were Needed!
By the Way - A Great Trade -
If’n You’re Not ‘College Material”!
My Own Home on Arabia Avenue
Was Built in 1926.
Around 1996 - 70 Years Later -
I personally Re-Plumbed the Entire House -
With Copper Tubing on the ‘Supply Side’ -
And PVC on the ‘Return’ or Drainage Side!
The Triple-Tub Laundry Sink Unit -
In the Basement had a ‘Common’ Drain -
Composed of Solid Lead -
Amazingly - it was Still Intact!
Back to The Future!
My Best Guess is That -
Someday, Someone will Discover That -
The PVC Releases Some Other Harmful Chemical?
Back to the ‘Drawing Board’!
Pb = Plumbium = Lead ...
Which Can Be Plumb Poisonous!
Am I Plumb Crazy?
A ‘Plumber’s Helper’ is a Plunger -
For Un-Stopping Ole’ Johnny’ -
While a Plumber’s Snake’ is a Wire
For cleaning out Clogged Drain Pipes.
Plumbiferous means Containing or Yielding Lead.
Plumbism is Long-Term Lead Poisoning -
Now that my Treatise is Ended,
The Question Remains ...
It was fun following your clever and meandering line of thought!
Happy New Year,
Christine
Reviewed by RWE SAYS BYE (Reader)
Reviewed on December 28, 2011
ha! I just have one question, Tom. Are you plum out of plum pudding? Seriously, though. Thanks for the lesson in creativity... now I'm really being challenged to get the lead out.
After reading your informative article, Tom, I've come to three conclusions. 1. All of the water pipes in washington must be lead.2, With all of that lead in the water, all of the the politicans must be plum, yet none of them are on the level. 3, Hence, Stan Laurel was right when he said,"You can lead a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead." Have a Happy New Year!
The Question does not remain as u answered it with much as always aplomb & stretching it out to the enth degree you have done as always without in anyway being dumb...my pipes are plastic at least the ones on the surface...Jurseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey
Starman beat me to it re. the Roman empire. However, I'm a bit surprised that you didn't mention something about the way most plumbers dress. Unfortunately a crack shows that not even solder can seal...
Dear Tom,
I have read,
If I am not,
Crazy in the head,
That Rome fell because,
Lead poisoning had left,
Their Romantic brains for dead.
I ain't sure if good Ole' Bawlmer,
Is really lead-ing you down or not,
But by a Chesapeake Chicken's guess,
I surmised whether,
Weather permitting or not,
That the blue crabs,
Would still be steamed,
Whether the cockle-doodle-doos,
Are telling the plain truth or not,
Perhaps those chicks are just plumb crazy,
Bawlmer bird-brains smoking pipes full of pot!
Complete Troubleshooting & Repairing guide to hot air furnaces * Complete operation, maintenance, and repair * Covers gas, oil, and electric forced air systems * Includes flowcharts and highlighted tips and solutions to common furnace problems
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'nuff sed!
:)
Regis
Happy New Year,
Christine
But one very ancient and very baffling question remains - What the heck are the old Jersey Devil's pipes made of - Swamp Gas??!!
Chip Bergeron
I have read,
If I am not,
Crazy in the head,
That Rome fell because,
Lead poisoning had left,
Their Romantic brains for dead.
I ain't sure if good Ole' Bawlmer,
Is really lead-ing you down or not,
But by a Chesapeake Chicken's guess,
I surmised whether,
Weather permitting or not,
That the blue crabs,
Would still be steamed,
Whether the cockle-doodle-doos,
Are telling the plain truth or not,
Perhaps those chicks are just plumb crazy,
Bawlmer bird-brains smoking pipes full of pot!
Happy New Year TY!
Starman