The Continuing Adventures

Of Mr. Piddles,

By Andy Turner & Eddie K

“Forget Piddles’ offer.

SPLAT will offer you triple what Piddles does.
And you can write your own contract.

Kindest Regards,”

                            S.P.L.A.T. President,

                       A. J. Turnaround

“Do on to Insects,

As Ye Would Have Done,

 On to Thyself.”

                 No, Not a Scriptural Verse,

                 This One Liner was Written By,

                    AD Author George Carroll

July 4, 2004

B.U.G. Headquarters

London, England

From the Desk of the

B.U.G. President

My Dearest Fellow BUG Members,

I have something important to say.

We have a brand new recruit,

This most wondrous of days.

Mr. Flower Child George,

Poet, Author, and Friend,

Has accepted our employment offer,

And this brings me joy without end.

George pens Inspirational Verses,

And is diligently studying Time Travel,

Secrets of the Universe, for BUG,

Flower Child hopes to unravel.

SPLAT had offered him RAID,

Money, and a brand new Hum Vee,

If Flower Child would only agree

To run down insects with glee.

But George is truly a man

Of noble honor and dignity.

Instead, he came to work for BUG,

For absolutely free.

George has graciously agreed

To act as our Ambulance Chief,

Driving our slightly used Bugmobile,

To insects paralyzed with grief.

When George gets an urgent call,

Of a nasty SPLAT Attack,

He will rush to the scene,

In a blink and a flash.

There he will look for survivors

In a Search, Rescue, and Assist,

Replacing their pain and sorrow,

With needed medication and bliss.

Then he will rush the injured bugs

To Bug Hospital on Lady Bug Lane,

Where our skilled insect doctors,

Will attempt to eradicate their pain.

Also volunteering to assist him

Is lovely Julie of the famous Mod Squad,

Who just received her CPR Certificate,

For All types of Insects and Arthropods.

While George speeds them to the hospital,

Julie will resuscitate them with skill.

She is one of the most dedicated workers,

That I have ever seen, at a SPLAT kill.

So please join me in welcoming George,

And in Congratulating Mod Squad Julie.

From the Desk of the BUG President,

Heartfelt Greetings from Yours Truly,

Mr. Piddles

To Be Continued:

Some very interesting developments today:

Noble Flower Child George as the new BUG Ambulance Chief,

And MOD Squad Julie, Certified Insect CPR Professional.

Wow!

I wonder how she manages to administer CPR to such tiny creatures.

She must truly be a Miracle Worker.

And Mr. Piddles asked me to pass this request on to all BUG Members:

George and Julie need volunteers to help them construct insect litters,

Since BUG has a very limited budget.

If you have some free time, and would like to help,

Please dial 1800 BUG AID.

Also, if you would like to donate toothpicks and duct tape,

For construction of these litters, let George know that, too.

Final Note for Today:

Mr. Piddles is hosting an Insect Poetry Recital at Dimly Manor,

On Thursday evening, July 15^th.

The Grasshopper will be reciting some of his fabulous insect poems.

Refreshments will be provided by Mr. Piddles, and will include

Some fabulous fish and chips, exquisitely prepared by

Mr. Piddles’ butler, chef, and chauffeur, Captain Snot Nose Jimmy.

You have not lived, until you’ve tasted Snot Nose Jimmy’s Fish and Chips!

Happy Independence Day, Everyone!

George and Julie are certainly doing their part – for Insect Independence.

If you, too, would like to make a difference – Dial 1 800 BUG.