“Winter is nature's way of saying,

‘Up Yours.’”

Robert Byrne

I awoke very early to an arctic blast

Even my dogs would not go outside

The new year had brought us a visitor

And from him, we just could not hide

That rascal Old Man Winter

Had come roaring into town

How quickly I had forgotten

That he hadn’t been around

He pulled up in his ice mobile

He parked right outside my door

Soon, he huffed and he puffed

And he rushed in along my floor

I was kind of shocked at first

About all I could do was stare

And suddenly – just like magic

Old Man Winter was everywhere

He now raced along beside me

He breathed ice upon my dome

He chilled me to the very bone

And soon, he felt right at home

“Ho, Ho, Ho,

I’m back, my startled little friend!

I’m here to freeze your fragile bones,

To the bitter, bone chilling, frigid end!”

“But Old Man Winter,

What have I done,

For you to act so badly,

To a lowly mortal son?”

“Why nothing - nothing at all,

My very skittish, human friend,

I’m sent here each and every year,

Just to test your mettle once again!

“I assure you that it’s nothing personal,

Don’t you extremely silly humans see?”

Now, Old Man Winter grinned at me

As he laughed again, so hysterically

After several very chilling minutes

I now found myself laughing, too

So I pulled out my jug of bourbon

And I poured a few shots, for two

“Here’s to you, Old Man Winter,

May you enjoy your lengthy stay.”

But silently, in my now frozen heart,

To the Maiden of Spring, I did pray.

©2008, A Frost Bit Mr. Ed