Red Neck Turkey Hunt

Well it's Thanksgiving again, that time a year
to put a bird on the table and have another beer.
Went hunting yesterday, my first turkey got shot.
You could hear shots ringing out in the parking lot.
I shot that turkey quick when I had the chance.
The ladies in the frozen aisle peed their pants!
The manager said I had to pay for the broken glass.
I'll send my ole man over there to beat his ass.
They shouldn't a set them birds out in plain sight
if they didn't want em shot that Wednesday nite.

They said I owed twenty bucks, I didn't wanna pay
but I give em a jackson at the checkout anyway.
I'd be hearing from their lawyer next business day.
I said “send him on over, if he visits he mite stay.”
Oh My Lord, what did our ancestors have to do
to get a Thanksgiving turkey and some rabbit stew?
Next Thanksgiving I think we'll eat road kill deer.
I can bring that home to cook without any fear
Of grocery store managers and lawyers, by God
or more startled ladies with wet panties in a wad.