Modeling the title of one of my all-time favorite short stories, Flannery O'connor's "A Tree, a Rock, a Cloud," this poem is about a dear friend of mine. This is not my typical style; nor is it up to my standards; however, I am trying to embrace repetition and patterning as possibly enhancing the tone of a poem.
A Man, A Dog, A Field
The man looks a decade beyond his years
The dog far fewer than hers
The fields are eternal.
The widower with dog lives in front of, not in the sticks
is different from his neighbors
though he shares their bad grammar
and owns a few guns.
The fields crawl with coyotes he frightens
to save the feral cats.
The man lost interest in everything
except cigarettes and wine
the dog stayed interested in the man
the gardens went to ruin.
The man and dog exist amidst the
things she left behind: clothing, books
sickly yellow plants: aloe, alone, thrives.
Statues of sightless angels
can nothing revive.
TV somewhat comforts the man
as does the loyal dog.
the man walks stooped and wounded
but grins if force-fed smiles
the lands lust greedily
when rare dense clouds collide.
The man is stronger than he knows
The dog knows nothing of woe
The fields feels nothing whatsoever
But could someday birth a rose.
Copyright Julianza Shavin 2008
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Reviews of "A Man, a Dog, a Field"
Reviewed by Darkest Angel (Reader)
Reviewed on April 10, 2010
Wow--here is some more of your great density (full-hearted/minded-expression)! Your way of putting things is very effective.
Julie, I think the pattern of this poem, and the repetition,
are not only attractive but do work effectively to enhance the
tone of the poem, the loss. -gene.
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are not only attractive but do work effectively to enhance the
tone of the poem, the loss. -gene.